It's over. The grand finale is now taking place. The final goodbye. It's not easy. He's a jerk, she's a bitch. Whatever the case, you guys are done. And now the healing takes place. The long drawn out healing. The moments of anguish, loneliness, anger, frustration and all other roller co aster emotions. Here comes the hard part.
No one likes to have to go through the tumultuous ordeal of breaking up. There are tolerable ways of getting through it and then there are the bad ones. The drunk texting, the stalking, you know what I'm talking about. Here are the top 10 break up rules you should adhere to in order to make your break up easier on everybody, even your friends.
You want to get drunk? Do it. You want to text while you're drunk? You can do that too. Just don't text your ex. Drunk texts are by far the very worst thing you can do , especially if they have already moved on and have a new partner. The last person they want to hear from is you. Don't torment yourself like that. Please leave them alone.
2. No begging.
This includes drunk texting. Do not beg your partner to take you back and don't listen to them beg you to come back. you should never have to beg anyone for anything, ever. Keep in mind, as well, that if the break up happened because of something someone did, that something will never go away and will be brought up in conversation all the time. Let it go.
3. No bashing.
This really doesn't serve any purpose at all. Sure, he probably did you wrong and she probably overstepped her boundaries. Either way, it doesn't really matter. No one is perfect. We all have a story and there are two sides to every break up story. What did you do to push them past their limits? Just don't bash. It's really not nice.
4. Don't date their friends.
This is just so wrong. If you are doing it only to get back at them, then you are just an evil selfish person. Please don't do that. Who are you hurting? The unsuspecting friend who doesn't know you are using them for evil. Don't use people. It's wrong.
5. Damage their property.
Oh please. Really. Grow up. How old are you? That is probably the meanest and most immature thing you can do to someone and what is the point? I totally understand you are angry and hurt and all that other stuff, but breaking someone's stuff is just pointless and senseless.
6. Give back what doesn't belong to you.
Period. If it isn't yours, give it back. Unless it was a gift or you both arranged for it to be yours upon the inevitable break up, return it. Why would you want to hang on to something that doesn't belong to you, especially if the person really wants it back? Just give it back. Let go.
7. You're not family anymore.
I mean you are but maybe you aren't? Independent of a very long term relationship, if you two were only sort of dating, you really aren't part of his/her family anymore so stop calling his/her mom and going to visit in hopes of seeing him/her. Move on now.
8. You're not going to be just friends.
Don't even think like that and don't even bother trying. It's not going to happen. Ever. Or at least not in the first year. You can be civil and that's great, but you don't have to hang out and have coffee and text like nothing happened. Something did happen. You had a relationship and now it's over. Carry on.
9. Break up sex is not a good idea.
It only hurts. More than you are already hurting. Don't have break up sex. It only leads to broken hearts and more days spent crying and longing for them. No contact, no drunk texts, no sex.
10. Forgive and forget.
Ok maybe the forget part won't be so easy, and neither will the forgiving but in order to move on in peace you must forgive. It's mandatory. I get what they did was absolutely horrible and they should be hung by their toe nails. I get it. But reliving their heinous crime over and over in your mind isn't going to help you get over them. Forgive and move on.
Hopefully some of these rules will help you get over your last break up or ease you into the break up you are about to experience. Whatever the case, #10 is probably the most important rule. It will help you more than you know. Do you have any break up rules to follow?