Relationships are give and take. Equally. Not one person giving and giving, the other person just taking and taking. There must be total fairness and equality in a relationship or you may as well just stop right now. So many people take their partners for granted and what ends up happening, after years of this, is relationship breakdown.
There are certain things we should expect in a relationship in order to make it work and run smoothly. Relationships don't run on their on. It takes a bit of work on both parts. If one partner isn't up for working on it anymore, well you're back to relationship breakdown and we want to prevent that. Right? Sometimes, love just isn't enough. So what can and should we expect?
I wonder if some people forgot what that word even means. Definition: admire (someone or something) deeply, as a result of their abilities, qualities, or achievements . Everyone deserves respect, period. Whether you are in a romantic relationship or a work relationship or even with your family and friends, respect should be given and received.
2. Accepting imperfections.
We all have them. No one is perfect. You better know how to roll with the punches, and imperfections of your partner. Expecting more from them than they can deliver puts unnecessary pressure and stress on them. Stress that nobody really deserves actually. You know what they can and can't do, and you know just as you aren't perfect, neither are they. Accept them, imperfections and all.
No matter what. You need to know that the person you are with, supports you and your endeavours, whatever they may be. There's nothing worse than looking for or needing your partner to lift you up or encourage you with regards to something only for them to shut you down. If you aren't on the same path, you'll end up in different destinations. Besides, it's nice to have someone you love encourage you without you having to beg or fight for it.
4. Forgive, forget and let's move on.
Independent of trying to forgive and forget the irreparable damaged stuff like affairs, we all make mistakes and we all deserve forgiveness for those little mistakes. The little ones like you forgot stop and buy milk on the way home from work. Getting mad and making your partner feel bad about that is not the way to be. Laugh it off and move on. You've forgotten the milk a few times too.
As in, you want to go to the movies with your friends, you want to go on a weekend getaway with a group from work. Freedom as in you can freely do your own thing, and them theirs without the third degree and with complete and 100% trust. Neither one of you should have to plead or argue with your partner about freely going out on your own. Trust, right? we shouldn't be chained to our partners. We all need our space.
6. Open communication.
When situations arise you definitely want to deal with them. Closing up and not wanting to talk is only going to lead to bigger problems. There should always be 100% open communication in order to avoid a feeling of disconnection or even mistrust. If you can't openly discuss problems and situations with your partner, then you might want to look into ways to learn new communication techniques so you can! It's that important.
7. Sense of humor.
Humor is always the best medicine and if you can't laugh at your faults and/or each other then you're going to have a problem. There are times when you just need some comic relief and certain situations will almost call for it. Some things just need to be handled with a good laugh. It's important for you to be able to just laugh some things off, together.
There obviously are many more things you should expect in a relationship but these are some of the foundational things that will help keep it all together.