It's been tough. This whole relationship has been up and down, back and forth, good and bad but lately it's been mostly bad. You've been thinking of leaving for a very long time and have just recently found the courage to do it. You get ready to tell your partner and then you back out again at the last minute, unable to follow through with it. This has been going on for a while now and it's about time to stop it.
So what's it going to take for you to finally write that good bye letter. How much more anguish and sadness do you need to feel before it's time? You already know it's important for you to do this, why haven't you yet then? Of course fear plays a big part in all this. Fear is downright crippling and will hold you anywhere for a very long time. There are a few things you must remind yourself of in order to take that leap of faith.
You're going to be ok.
First and foremost, keep telling yourself you will be ok. Many of us who want to leave a relationship think that we can't make it on our own without our partner. Of course you can and chances are, you'll be able to make it even better without them. We think the worst things will happen when in fact, none of them ever do. You're going to be ok. Keep reminding yourself of that.
You are way better off.
You already know this but you fall into that "things aren't so bad" mode and decide against your plans to leave. You know life will be beyond fantastic when you leave so hurry up and do it. Why do we prolong our happiness? You already know that every single aspect of your life is going to be great the minute you leave. Don't wait another minute.
That freedom that you have been longing for will finally be yours. You know the freedom I speak of. That freedom that you get when you are finally on your own doing your own thing with no one to answer to. That freedom where you can come and go as you please and not worry about getting interrogated like you just committed murder. That freedom to be who you are all the time and not have to pretend to be someone you're not to make someone else happy. Yes, that freedom will be yours.
You don't need anyone.
Get out of that "I need you" mentality. You don't need anyone but yourself. You are perfectly capable of making decisions on your own and you have already made some great decisions all by yourself. You don't need anyone to decide things for you. Once you start making decisions for yourself again you will see how awesome these decisions are for you and self confidence will follow.
Make room for awesome.
You have been hanging on for far too long to a love/relationship that doesn't supply you with all the love and happiness you deserve. You know you are deserving are far more than your partner is giving you. you also know that you would really like a solid loving relationship. When you finally leave you are making room for the perfect for you partner to show up. You are blocking them right now. Let go of the old, make room for the new.
Who am I anyway.
Who are you really? For years, you've been this person trying to please someone else. You've been a pretend person keeping the peace just to make everyone else happy but the most important person, you, isn't happy. As soon as you leave, you will have time to discover who you really are and all the things that make you happy or not. You can do more of the happy things and dump the things you've been doing for years that don't bring you joy.
No one wants to go through the dreaded break up. We all hope to stay with our partner til death to us part but sometimes that's just not possible and the breakup part is really hard to do. So we hang on. It's time to let go and go live a happier life. We are all here for joy, not misery. If you are in a relationship now that is causing you misery, it's time to let go. You deserve happiness.