We all would like to think we have pretty solid relationships. You and your partner have been together for many years and there's no sign of anyone going anywhere anytime soon. It's pretty solid. You think. I mean, you guys have been through thick and thin and always manage to come out smiling. You've survived the in-laws, the job loss, the kids moving away to college. Yes, you are definitely sure you are pretty solid.
But what if this doesn't sound like you and your partner at all? What if it's been wall after wall and now you two simply co-exist, maybe for the kids, maybe because things aren't that bad. Maybe it's more trouble to separate than stay together. Whatever the case may be, let's have a look and see what some of the differences are between a solid relationship and a weak one.
Ever. You two trust each other day in an d day out. Going out with the girls/guys for a night on the town doesn't cause any anxiety for the other partner. They hope you have a super awesome time and when you get home they want to hear all about (if they're still up). In a weak relationship, going out independently is cause for a great debate and fight. It's never an easy thing and someone always ends up mad, upset or hurt.
2. Personal space is expected and encouraged in a solid relationship.
You insist your partner take time out on their own to go on a little road trip, go to a spa for the day or maybe even just go to the spare room and read, in peace, with no distractions. Personal space is very important for our emotional wellbeing. If you are in a weak relationship, your partner will more than likely not let you go on a day trip alone and will disturb you while you are trying to get some you time. It could be attachment issues or jealousy, whatever the case, it's weak.
3. Partners in solid relationships discuss situations as they arise.
Those in a weak relationship will either brush it under the rug or fight about in a screaming name calling door slamming match. This kind of behaviour is not healthy and indicates weakness in the relation ship. Any issue or situation that comes up should be handled and dealt with in a mature manner with both parties talking it out civilly. Fighting all the time is never a good thing.
4. Encourage and support is never in short supply in a solid relationship.
If you have a dream or an idea, your partner is right there beside you to lift you up, cheer yo u on, and help you anyway they can. In a weak relationship your partner will try to talk you out o f whatever idea you have or tell you that you aren't good enough, smart enough or brave enough to do whatever it is that you want to do. Sometimes, partners in weak relationships don't really want you to change or get better. There's that jealousy thing again.
5. Emotionally available.
People in solid relationships are emotionally available to each other and for each other, all the time. if one needs emotional support, for whatever is causing them sadness or anxiety, the other partner is there, no questions asked. In a weak relationship, the other partner can't be bothered to listen to you cry for nothing and can even be annoyed by your emotional outbursts. There is little to no emotional support between the two.
6. Where on earth is the trust?
Trust is never an issue in a solid relationship. You two are like best friends and have never had to deal with trust as an issue. There have been no lies, no secrets, no deceit. In a weak relationship, trust is always a big ordeal. There is little to none and one partner is constantly questioning the other about their whereabouts, their phone calls, etc. That's no way to live.
Being in a solid relationship certainly takes work but if you both are honest, caring and loving not only towards each other but to people in general, you already have that soul connection and being in a solid relationship will just come naturally.
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