Relationships

4 Proven Ways To Making A Relationship Work

Krishan Kalpoe
Written by Krishan Kalpoe

When you find or have someone in your life who accepts you for who are then you know:   you have a keeper. Especially when your previous relationships didn’t work out and you kind of “˜gave up’ on love, you might be thinking, that this is the relationship that you’ve been looking for your whole life and that you really don’t want to mess this one up too. Or maybe when you’re already in a long-term relationship and you desperately want to make this to last for the rest of your life, you might be asking yourself:   how could I accomplish that?

Stepping into a relationship with these negative overthinking thoughts of “˜not screwing up’ or having them while you’re in one, puts unconscious pressure on the relationship, because you’re overthinking. You’re overthinking on how you should make this relationship work. Lucky for you, we’ve relieved you from this draining task, because in this article you’ll find out what “˜the ways to go’ are to make any relationship work, based on the best teacher life has to offer: experience.

1. Have an Interdependent relationship

We all have that romantic thought in our heads that when we find our partner we suddenly become whole again. However, this might not as be romantic as it sounds, because basically what you’re telling yourself is that your well-being depends on your (future) partner. This is not fair to either one of you, because it will always be mentally exhausting for the both of you, since you’re always relying on your partner for your well-being and because of this you’re giving your partner barely the space to do his/her own thing. That’s why it’s better to have an interdepended relationship. This is a mutual reliance between two persons in a relationship. So now both persons in the relationship are on an equal level of “˜needing’ each other. This creates a healthy environment where the two of you are both doing their own thing and also at the same time equally want to be with each other to spend time together.

2. Let go of expectations

It’s normal to expect certain things of each other in a relationship like for example; faithfulness, honesty, trying to bring out the best in each other and so forth. Having these expectations is completely normal in a relationship, but they stop being “˜normal’ as soon as you begin expecting things of your partner that he/she may not be able to do or when you’re having unrealistic expectations of your partner that you can’t even fulfill. The key with expectations in relationship is to find a balance between what you desire and what’s realistic.

3. Communicate

The words left unsaid damage relationships the most. When you’re having a problem in your non-shared environment, for example at your job, you should talk about it with your partner. Because when you don’t, you’ll unconsciously become a different person (maybe more agitated or frustrated etc.) which can lead to having arguments with your partner that could have been avoided if you were just honest about the issues that you had. That’s why communication is so important in a relationship, because it can save you from a lot of energy draining things like having arguments or misunderstandings. It’s better to prevent a problem than to cure one, right?!

4. Unconditional sharing

Great relationships are based on one mantra in particular; share with each other without having the intention to receive. It’ll make things so much easier when you and your partner live according to this mantra, because when one of you does something special for the other It’ll really feel like a genuine action with genuine intentions and your partner won’t   have the feeling   to return “˜the favor’ a.s.a.p.

To conclude this article, just take a moment to think about the relationships in your environment. Do these relationships consist of the 4 discussed factors in the article? Probably the “˜bad’ relationships are missing some or lacking in one of them in comparison with the good ones. The main giveaway of this article is to let you know that there aren’t some sort of “˜secrets’ to make a relationship a success and that you’re actually perfectly   capable of making the relationship work with your dream partner, if you’re willing to take these factors in account!

About the author

Krishan Kalpoe

Krishan Kalpoe

Krishan Kalpoe is the founder of Shrinksdom & an aspiring psychologist who has a passion for personal development and wants to share his knowledge with the world for the purpose of making people's lives better.