13 ways to be a better lover
Okay this one is for the guys. Guys often get a bad rap when it comes
to their bedroom antics. It doesn't have to be this way. An explanation
might be needed for the women reading this. Guys, when we are young are
labelled a freak until we've had sex with someone, it often doesn't matter
with whom and where as long as we get sex. It's like a ritual. we
start to go a funny shape if we haven't had sex by a certain age.
Now for some men this 'go get it' attitude never really leaves them and they
carry this on into their long term relationships. we are not taught how
to make love properly and it's kinda embarassing going into borders and buying
'the joy of sex' book, although amazon has changed all that. However
with these 13 tips you can become a Casanova in no time and you will be 'getting
it' more than ever.
- Always, always, always be attentive.
Guys are often seen as being a bit insensitive. This is not always the
case but it is generally true that they are less sensitive than women. We
need to pay close attention to our partner's feelings and wants and act
on them accordingly.
- Spoil your partner
Spoil them in every way, in the bed, in the house, lavish them with attention
when out, buy little gifts, leave little notes. All this stuff is not
just for newly weds; it's for the rest of your life if you want it.
Touching and stroking your partner is great for us and even better for them. A
warm sensual oil massage can be the most sensual thing in the world and it
gets you brownie points. However don't spoil the massage moment
by giving her a quick 5 minute rubdown and then expect a long sensual 30 minute
massage for you.
- Make it last another 10 minutes
If you are used to making love for 10 minutes, which can be great, make it
last another 10 minutes by touching, kissing and caressing more. Then
after a few weeks increase it again by another 10 minutes.
- Kiss before and after
There is nothing better than a full on kiss before making love. However
there is nothing better than a full on kiss after making love. I know,
I know the sleep monster is trying to kick in at this stage but it is well
worth paying attention and kissing and stroking for 10 minutes after making
- Caress, don't grab!
I have often confused breasts with lumps of clay to mould and shape as I see
fit, apparently this is not how it's done. Caressing is much better,
teasing and kissing softly is much better, you should see results immediately.
- Try new things
If you partner suggests a new move or a new anything else be willing to try
it. If you don't like it then be honest and tell her.
- Tell her you love her (if you have a partner, not needed
a one night stand!)
This might sound too simple, but it's important for women to hear this. Don't
just glance from the TV and say "˜love you babe', every once in
a while tell her why you love her, she's sexy, intelligent, a great mother,
a great lover, a fantastic wife just tell her why you love her.
- Kiss all over
Try every area of the body until you find the sweet spots and then concentrate
on them in the future. Vary the routine. I used to think there
was a set formula of 5 minute fumble, kiss a little, make love, and fall asleep. Thankfully
that was in my younger days, now its 6 minutes for the fumble (only kidding!). Try
changing your love making habits, lie making love during the day not just in
bed before going to sleep, try it in the morning, you get the picture.
- Ask what your partner likes
There is no better way of knowing what you partner likes than asking them.
- Dress it up a little
This can be a great way of injecting something different into your lovemaking. Don't
be afraid to tell your partner your kink and ask them to oblige and similarly
be willing to dress it up.
This can be the most important part of lovemaking for your partner. If
we are being honest, guys are brought up to relieve the tension quickly. However
it can be great for both partners to experience increased tension by making
foreplay last much longer.
- Enjoy the experience
It's great, it can de-stress us, it can give us a great "˜after
sex sleep', it brings us closer to our partner, enjoy the whole experience.