Being an empathic intuitive is something I have come to terms with and have embraced it to be a full part of who I really am. This doesn't mean that I recently became an empathic intuitive…I was born this way. However, not understanding this lent to feeling awful more often than not and I suffered plenty. As an adult I've learned methods to help me deal with this and being an empathic intuitive transmuted from curse to gift.
What is an Empath?
An empath is someone who can experience the feelings, thoughts and/or attitudes of others. An empath can also feel the energy of a room full of people. According to Dr. Jane McGregor"“some 40% of human beings are born with an ability to sense when something isn't right. Empaths are highly perceptive and insightful.
For example, if I spent time with (even innocently sat next to) someone who was depressed, angry and/or generally unhappy….guess who felt the same way? As a child, I didn't understand that I was feeling someone else's emotions. I merely felt them and owned those feelings as my own. This felt miserable…and even more, it felt confusing because I had no justification for them. I just felt that way
What is an Intuitive?
An intuitive person can perceive truth or fact independent of data and reasoning. It is being able to have keen and quick insight. Intuition is something we are all born with; some feel it more than others. Intuition can be developed in everyone.
Empathic Intuitives are feelers who don't have to have details of events and experiences, we simply feel it and have a knowingness about it. The definitions are simple enough but being it is something totally different.
This example may help you understand. Imagine you walk into a room where you witness a married couple arguing and suddenly the husband punches his wife in the gut sending her to the floor rendering her virtually unable to breath. How do you feel seeing this experience? Do you get a sick feeling in the pit of your stomach? Now, remove the description and image I gave you of the husband and wife and just keep the feeling in the pit of your stomach. That is what an empathic intuitive may feel after meeting someone…no need for the details, just the feeling and a knowingness that something is terribly off. The reverse is true, too. We can meet someone and feel totally great about them.
I have always dealt with a plethora of emotions and intuition coming at me all of the time: from family, from friends, from co-workers, from strangers at the mall …I lived most of my life taking on other people's stresses, worries, concerns, anger, resentment, and so on. Like a sponge, I absorbed everyone's stuff and reacted to it resulting in a lot of unnecessary disputes, confrontations, sadness and often loneliness.
Drowning Out the Feelings
As a natural way to drown out the feelings I absorbed, I would put on layers…of clothes and fat. I loved turtlenecks, sweaters, jackets and food and just about anything that would put distance between me and anyone else. After losing weight in the last few years, I really understood what emotional eating was all about. Learning methods of shielding others energies away from me and finally understanding that what I was feeling was someone else's baggage and not my own was naturally helpful in keeping the weight off.
Spiritual Understanding and Managing Empathic Feelings
God created everyone with purpose. Sometimes we fall away from our Divine path, but nonetheless, we are all here with purpose and come from Divine Love — NO DOUBT ABOUT THAT.
Embracing my spiritual journey caused me plenty of inner conflict when vibes that didn't feel good came up around individuals (or situations). An internal struggle began when every molecule of my being believes that all people come from Divine love — yet, I would encounter someone and felt something that didn't match that vibration. It was difficult to embrace and love and welcome them wholly into my world.
How do I process that icky warning feeling? My discovery — love and boundaries. Because someone may have fallen away from their own Divine path, doesn't mean I have to go along with them. It doesn't mean I have to embrace them. It's ok to steer away"“never condemning them, but holding the other person in your mind's eye with love and light.
Being connected to Spirit gives us the ability to also lovingly practice discernment. I found comforting words in Sonia Choquette's book, "The Psychic Pathway." Sonia is a renowned psychic and spiritual teacher. Unlike me, she was brought up in a household where her mother's "vibes" anchored everything (her mother was also a psychic). Sonia's mother used her intuition to help guide her children, whom they made friends with, where they would go and so on. In her household, intuition was valued by her family and they felt protected and safe by it.
Setting Loving Boundaries is a Healthy Spiritual Practice
My journey led me to teachers and authors who helped me understand and manage empathy. Understanding how an empathic intuitive processes energy made such a huge and positive difference for me. What a relief to know I wasn't crazy. Meditation, energy healing and clearing and shielding are necessary components to live better — feel better. Ability to feel energy like this naturally brought me to energy healing that not only helps me, but others, as well.
Instead of being caught up in the energy of others, I recognize that it is not my own energy and that I can make healthy and loving decisions about how to handle it. Setting loving boundaries and limiting (and/or even eliminating) time spent with those who suffocate my spirit, my energy in a way that was unhealthy is a good and healthy spiritual practice for me and my family.
Oh…and as a side note…if you have children…practicing setting loving boundaries for yourself is an excellent lesson for your children as you send them off to school, parties, and events. They absolutely should know and practice loving discernment naturally and comfortably…and they learn best by watching you
Looking back, all of those experiences (as lonely and as confusing and uncomfortable as they may have felt) have helped me understand who I am today and aligned me to my life's purpose… helping others tap in and turn on their inner wisdom and helping them create the life they love.