Every day, you answer these questions subconsciously and most of the time you are not aware of the effect they have on your wellbeing. You want to be more successful, you want to live a life of meaning and fulfillment but something always halts you and these simple decisions could well be the reason you are stalled.
Are you comparing yourself to another?
Who do you think has what you don’t? Who do you think is better than you? Subconsciously, you put your own brakes on as you think that nothing you do can compare to how excellently this other person performs but you forget that you are created to shine in your own specific way.
You have a specific call on your life and it is like nothing anyone else does and while you quietly compare yourself to others, you stop tapping into your own uniqueness and you create unhappiness where there need not be any.
Who you are is enough for the work you are called to do. Find fulfillment as you follow your own specific path.
Are you listening to the wrong advice?
So, someone you admire has told you to act a certain way, to do a certain thing, to be a certain person as that will get you acceptance. However, you know that this is not the real version of you. It feels false, it feels fake and you feel trapped in an identity that is not even you.
Wake up and own who you are. If you are going to have an impact on the planet then you must see again that who you are, is enough. Start with that premise and feel you r happiness rise as you start to be yourself in your dealing with the marketplace and the world. The initial reaction to this “˜new’ version of you may be muted as they get used to you but as you remain consistent to the calling within you, your happiness levels will rise and in time, people will come round to your way of being
Are you addicted to approval?
Carrying on from the last point, if you are addicted to the approval of other people”¦ People you know and people you don’t! Then it will feel tough to own who you are. And yet, for your life to really count in YOUR eyes, you need to stop caring so much about what others think or say.
You are on this planet for a limited time and you need to do YOUR work to make it count. You need to be who you are to make it count and do the things you want to do in order to create the things you want to have. No more approval addiction, learn to love the person you are.
Do you Hold Back Because You Are Afraid?
Are you subconsciously holding yourself back because you are afraid of making a mistake? Or maybe you are even afraid that you will succeed and get exposed and be unprotected? Whatever the reason is for your fear, do you really want a life determined by fear?
I know the answer to that and yet, I also know how tough it can feel to overcome fears at times. Do this quick exercise as many times as you need to, in order to move forward. Write out what you want and then write out what fears come up as you write out your desires. Look them square in the face and turn them around. So you fear being exposed when you create all the wealth that is yours ““ Instead of fear, choose to believe that everyone has got your back and so though they look at you, they want the best for you. Choose a new belief in the face of every fear. Remember that every single fear inside your head was just a belief that you made true by repetition so now, get deliberate about designing beliefs that empower you and repeat them to yourself until they replace the fears.
Are you overly concerned by the way you look?
I have had moments when I thought that the fact that I was black was going to act against me. I have had moments when I thought my afro look was too unpalatable for the marketplace and I have been tempted to try to change who I am to suit all these unknown people. Thankfully, I am mostly over that. I have learnt to accept myself and that has certainly made life easier and made me happier.
What part of you do you not accept? Yes, you could take on plastic surgery for certain things but the underlying feelings will remain. Deal with them first and make choices on such permanent changes from a place of strength, not approval seeking or fear.
Again, who you are, is enough for the work you are designed to do, the people you are called to serve and the impact you are created to have on the world. Find peace and happiness in that.