There is a lot of talk about enlightenment these days, especially in spiritual circles.
The concept of enlightenment is linked to Buddhism and is a state of spiritual knowledge and insight. This is very different from the European Enlightenment, where reason and individualism ruled.
So many people today will "show you the way" as long as you pay them. Many gurus talk a lot about being unenlightened – but might these "leaders" be unenlightened as well?
1. Become an object:
Objectify your living. Gender. Race. Nationality. Age. Sex. Good. Bad. Bad student. Good mother. Fashionista. Lover. Romantic. Give yourself as many labels as you can find and be sure to showcase them to everyone, so that everyone can see the branded version of the object that you are.
2. Live in the past and the future – never in the now.
Nothing is going on now, right? Everything you love is in the past or in the future. For example: It's raining outside and there's no good light to make a selfie. It's not Christmas, not my birthday and not summer. And everyone on Tinder has been swiped away.
3. Make a story about your life and believe every word of it.
The story you tell yourself becomes truth! Tell yourself life is hard; that you're meant to be unhappy, sad and bitter. Your husband is out of shape. Your body is always hurting you. Your coffee is always cold. And winter comes EVERY year "¦ how rude!
4. Don't believe in spirituality or the universe.
You're just living on a chunk of stone and you have no purpose in life. Why believe in something spiritual or universal?
5. Don't appreciate life. Kill it all.
All that meat from the store near you has your name on it, even though it destroys the very planet you live on. Why worry about what it's affecting? You are here to be unenlightened and unaffected by truth, so grill that steak and dig in!
6. Listen to EVERY thought you have and let them define you.
You've got 90,000 thoughts and you should listen to every one of them. Let them define the object that they create you to be. Your being is small enough to fit in a backpack, so your definition of self should be less than a Twitter feed.
7. Don't give anything to anyone.
You might not know what you miss before you lose it, so never give away anything. Hoard all of your stuff and things. Your things are connected to you and without them you can't be the object you really are.
You feel an emotional connection to stuff. You even care more about the life and death of your objects like your iPhone – than any human being on the street or in the third world. (Yes, that is true unenlightenment and we've all got it!)
8. Don't meditate.
Fill your mind with chaos, noise and distractions so you never become fully rested, peaceful and joyful.
9. Don't feel pain.
Numb your emotions with alcohol, food or prescription drugs. If you have mental or physical pain, there are a variety of medicines you can get from your doctor to remove this right away. Never go to the source of anything because you might actually fix it.
10. Get stuck in the "hamster wheel".
Be focused on goals. Never stop running. Always focus on the next big thing. When you are with your loved ones, constantly think about the day you get "that job", "that book deal" or "that partner" so that you're never fully aware of the present.
11. Throw gratitude out the door:
Being grateful means accepting things or people. Unenlightened people don't accept themselves or others.
So throw gratitude out the door, and always (at least 5-10 times per day) find something to be worried, angry or upset about. It's raining. Someone is talking too loud. There's too much traffic.
Everything around you can be turned into a negative that you don't want in our life, so use this principle whenever you can.
13. Keep looking and keep searching.
Always look outside your soul for solutions, strategies, things to do, things to follow, things to like, stories to read and everything that can show you the direction you should go. Keep running as fast as you can so you won't sense the present moment sneaking up on you, begging you to stop.
14. Charge money to tell the truth.
If you are truly a master and unenlightened, give people your wisdom and insight for a fee.
15. Be ignorant.
Close yourself off from knowledge and truth and hide out in your individualism. Ignorance is definitely bliss, and it's also a denial of reality. Keep shielding yourself from the truth. Unenlightenment is just around the corner.
Obviously, there is no goal in being unenlightened. But having "enlightenment" as a goal instantly separates you from it.
Enlightenment is a state of being. I believe everyone can reach it, but only when we totally meet the present moment with no goals, no state of mind, no riles, objects, reasons or thoughts.
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