One must know oneself. If this does not serve to discover truth, it at least serves as a rule of life and there is nothing better. "“ Blaise Pascal
In this time and age, do you still recognize who you really are?
This is one of the most difficult questions to answer, and I know you'll agree with it. When we were kids, we started to learn new things and when we're asked of who we wanted to become, we are certain of what to answer; a cop, doctor or lawyer. However, as we grow older things get a little more complicated. It seems that putting conviction on what you decide to become is not as easy as it did way back before. It's because of change.
Change is the only constant thing in the world. As life drew changes to come our way, at times we resist to it, and sometimes we just go with it. Either way, there are lessons learned "“ most of them hit hard and slaps us in the face for us to realize the true value of things, as well as picking up from our mistakes. In connection to this, as years pass us by, and more changes have tested us, the more it is difficult to answer who we really are. Probably, there came a point in your life when you look at yourself in the mirror and no longer see yourself, but a completely different person.
Why? It is because people that come and go in our lives contributed greatly to the changes within ourselves; decisions, dreams, personality and a whole lot more. Mostly, the most heartbreaking part
How can I say so? I've been there myself. I've shed buckets of tears and had sleepless nights while asking myself what I really want and who I wanted to be. In the long run, I've figured out what needs to be done in the lieu of sulking, I decided to rediscover myself and live a better life I've always dreamed of.
Here, let me share how I came to unravel a better life by rediscovering the real me. Hopefully, it can help you too.
1. Take A Break
When was the last time you went out for a holiday or spent quality time on a vacation? This is the perfect time for you to give yourself a getaway from whatever keeps you preoccupied. During weekends, take the time to unwind and be with yourself or with the people you love. By giving yourself a little respite from your daily routine and away from what worries or bothers you, you can clear your mind and deliberate on what you really want. It's an instrument towards self-fulfillment and it holds great supremacy in reopening the windows to your soul. Ponder on the most important things in your life and learn to value yourself. Remember this rule: NEVER underestimate the power of a break and no one should deprive you of this privilege.
2. Assess Yourself
As life pass you by so fast, sometimes you no longer notice what's significant and you easily get distracted to glitters of life, without paying much attention to the diamonds that actually awaits you. In the long run, you end up tired and full of questions about who you really are "“ you seem lost. Given this, you can't even rely on your own conviction. In times like this, fretting will do you no good. Instead, sit down in one corner or go to a place where you can think freely, grab a cup of tea or coffee and assess yourself. Ponder on the things that you want to achieve, what have you done so far, where are you in the journey of reaching your dreams and what you hope you could have done "“ write it all down. Once you have determined these, eventually, you'll realize what went wrong along the way. Find a solution within you.
3. Acknowledge Negative Emotions and Let Go
According to Morrie Schwartz (Tuesdays with Morrie, a book by Mitch Albom),
"Detachment doesn't mean you don't let the experience penetrate you. On the contrary, you let it penetrate you fully. That's how you are able to leave it."
In other words, you have to acknowledge the negative emotions first and once you have gained full acceptance of what it could cause or lead you to do, then it's the time to let it go "“ there's no need to keep holding it in. Why? It's because that's the very reason why you can't see things clearly and it blurs your mind from what the future lays before you. Accept stress "“ it defines how much you can do; heartaches and pain "“ it'll make you stronger; but learn when to let those feelings go. Denial will just lead to demise. Sometimes, life can give a lesson in the hard way but it is where you'll gain the most and find a sense of purpose within you.
4. Do Whatever Makes You Happy
Always remember that you only live once "“ so you better do whatever makes you happy. By doing so, you'll add more meaning into your life. For years that you have dedicated your life to do favors for others and giving them what they need, it's the best time to give yourself the same treatment. Take time to have some fun and live your dreams "“ do whatever you've always wanted to do. No one can tell what can make you happy, besides, life has no definite meaning. It's your choices that provide significance to it and your own happiness lies in your hands. Let worries and fret hold you back no more and always stay positive. Failure to find happiness will only bring you regrets that should've done the right things when you had the time.
5. Invest In A Good Night Sleep
You, along with a lot of people, might think that you could get away with a little sleep "“ then think again. Lack of sleep could increase the risks of having medical conditions or diseases such as heart attack, obesity, diabetes and more. Also it could trigger stress which leads to impulsive decisions, short-fused temper and getting fed up. Ultimately, you'll have difficulties in coping up with what life throws at you and you can't even notice that your life is drifting away from your grasp. Hence, it is paramount that you achieve better sleep in order to possess a clear mind to help you think openly along your journey in rediscovering yourself. Whenever you feel angry or mad, just sleep through it. Once your mind clears, that's when you'll realize the things that you should do to overcome your personal blunders.
6. Find Inner Peace
This is probably the most difficult part "“ finding inner peace. Most of the times, we are all experiencing that we are at war with ourselves because we are torn between choices. Aside from that, whether you admit it or not, it is human nature to have insatiable desires and wants. Given this, material things occupy our short attention span and sometimes we forget that we need time to reflect on what we really NEED to have a fulfilled life.
Insecurities ruin goals "“ so stop chasing after everyone else's dream, focus on your own goals. Let go of the past and don't dwell on it; forgive and forget "“ acceptance will be your key. In the long run, you'll find peace and soon you'll unravel the truth of who you really are.
Rediscovering the real you may not be easy "“ and that's for sure. However, you just have to do it not to please everybody else, but to fulfill your own journey in life; live your purpose. Every obstacle and challenge may pose changes upon you, just don't resist "“ don't shy away from it. Instead embrace it and once you knew who you really are, it'll just be another chapter you've come to conquer. Always believe in yourself.
Now, the question is, are you man enough to rediscover the REAL you? Or are you just contented of who you think you are right now?