A lot of us in life don't achieve the things we want to achieve for a lot of different reasons. I believe one of the main reasons is that we are not confident about where we are going. We over analyse, over question, over prepare, over fret, over everything.
Where are you going?
Where about in France?
Hotel De Crillon
Who are you going with?
My wife and two children
What Airline are you using?
Where are you flying from?
What time is your flight?
etc etc etc
When you go on holiday you are totally confident about where you are going to. You don't necessarily know what's going to happen when you get there, or if there are going to be delays, but no matter what, you are booked on a trip and you know exactly where you are going.
Why don't we do this in life?
Book a goal and just go there. It doesn't matter how you get there, but just be confident that you will get there. Don't worry about it being realistic, just book it and starting walking toward it.
This is not another motivational article saying 'dream big, visualise, see it in your mind and it will manifest itself'. This is an article about being confident that you are going to reach your goal.
When I coached a client recently and asked them what they want to do in life, I got back the answer: I would love to be an artist. I asked them if they had painted anything and he advised he had, I then congratulated him on becoming an artist. Somewhat confused he said he hadn't sold any of his work so he is not an artist. 'Ah' I said, so you don't want to be an artist, you want to be someone who gets paid for their artwork? Isn't that what all artists want? 'Not necessarily' I replied, artists paint because they love to paint, they don't necessarily need the recognition for them to be confident about their artwork. He replied he wanted to be recognised as a great artist. I asked him, recognised by who? An art critic who has never painted in his life or by someone who doesn't recognise the meticulous brush strokes he used when creating his artwork only for them to buy it because it would go well with their bedroom colour scheme.
If you want to be an artist, paint a picture and call yourself an artist and brush up on your skills whilst painting more pictures (pardon the pun 🙂 )
If you want to be a writer, write a book and call yourself the author of (fill in the blank) and keep writing because you love to.
If you want to ride in the Tour De France, get of your arse, start peddling and make it happen
The need to over (everything), it
We have this need sometimes, to over analyse things and put barriers in our way. If you have a goal in life all you need to do is be confident about your goal, know, within yourself, why you are doing it, get passionate about it and keep your eye on the goal at all times.
Deal with the hurdles as they turn up, but don't create the hurdles before they turn up,
Deal with the stress when it arises, but don't create the stress before you get there,
Listen to others opinions about your goals, but don't let the opinions put you off,
Deal with what you will do when you get there, when you get there, but don't analyse what you will do before you get there, as you will never get there.
Don't stop to think about it, go with the flow whilst your goal is hot and passionate and turn your 'I'm going to……' into 'I am….'