Personal Development

6 Ways To Get Your Emotions Under Control

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All hell has just broken loose. Your car needs repairs, the rent is due, your boyfriend just dumped you, your kids are driving you nuts, your boss is a jerk and the day has just started. Any of these things is stressful enough in itself to handle let alone all of them or more all happening at the same time. Life sometimes throws us curveballs and we become emotional wrecks.

Short of tearing all your hair out and losing your marbles, how on earth are we supposed to handle our emotions when it seems there is no end to the vicious cycle of bad luck? Don't despair. There is a way, or in this case 5 ways, to handle that emotional rollercoaster and remain calm, cool and collected. Depending on what emotions you are feeling, these ways will cover all of them and you'll be smiling again in no time.

emotions_under_control1. Avoid stressful situations.

That may sound easier said than done but if you know that wherever you are going, there are going to be people who trigger you, perhaps avoid it altogether or maybe just them. It's possible. You don't necessarily have to go anywhere you are not comfortable or will make you unhappy. Unless it's work related and you must attend, then stay away. You already know what kind of emotions are going to show up when you enter t his situation so why would you want to put yourself through that? You have a choice.

2. Think back to a time this happened before.

Whatever the situation is, it may h ave happened already once or twice in your life. How did you handle it then? What was the outcome of the situation? How did you feel or what did you have to go through? Ask yourself these questions while you are assessing the situation and you will be better equipped to deal with it the second time around. If what you did last time didn't work, then try something else that might.

3. Let them flow.

Yes. Every emotion you are going through, just get it out. Let it flow right out of your body and your head. Holding in any kind of feeling will just enable them to fester and build and that's not what we want. We want to deal with them and then let them go. Anger, fear, hatred, sadness, whatever they may be. Feel them, embrace them, understand them and then let them go. Once you have released them, they no longer control you, you now control them.

4. Think about something else.

I know, another easier said than done tactic but it works. Really. Depending on what the problem is, think about another time that wasn't so stressful or bad. Another time when things were good and were running smoothly. Or another time when this same thing happened and the outcome was favourable. Think about anything else good and something other than the stressful situation at hand.   When you shift your attention, you take control of what could potentially be an emotional disaster.

5. We don't always have to react the same way.

Try changing your reaction. Last time this happened you flew off the handle. How about this time we sit down, remain calm, let the situation unfold and then analyze it? If what you did last time didn't work why would you want to react in the same manner again this time? We want effective solutions to our problems and situations, not repeat patterns.

6. Talk it out.

Either with a friend, partner, family member or even to yourself if you are alone. Talk out your problem or the situation. Sometimes when we actually hear it being laid out in our own voice we can see it from a different perspective. Something will jump out at us that we might have missed during the situation. Talk out every detail. See how it sounds to you and you might be surprised at how some of it actually sounds kind of silly.

It's so easy to lose our cool when shitty things happen but they are bound to happen at anytime to any of us. All kinds of things. We are not always prepared for these things so our reactions are quick and usually off the charts. Independent of tragedy striking, your first means to control your emotions is to always take a step back and remain calm. You can asses better from that standpoint. After that, you'll be able to handle like a boss.

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About the author

Steven Aitchison

Steven Aitchison is the author of The Belief Principle and an online trainer teaching personal development and online business.  He is also the creator of this blog which has been running since August 2006.