Are you a people pleaser? Always saying yes when someone asks for a favour. You feel like you will die with guilt if you say NO. The very thought of even thinking of saying NO makes you ill and causes a great deal of anxiety. You think of a thousand different ways to say NO but in the end you don’t, and yes comes out of your mouth, again. It’s always been this way for you and you’re starting to get tired of it. You wish there was a way to end the madness and learn how to say NO, once and for all.
Let’s look at the reasons why we don’t like to say NO and then we’ll give you 10 reasons why you should. For many, saying NO means people will have these thoughts about us:
We don’t care
We are mean or rude
We have better things to do
We aren’t kind or loving
You already know you aren’t any of those things. You are a kind, loving and caring person. Keep reading and find out why you need to say No more often and how, when you do, others will see you as the beautiful person you really.
10 Reasons to Say NO More Often
Amen. When you start saying NO people will start having more respect for you and not take you for granted. The reason they take advantage of you now is because they know they can. Once you start saying no, they will eventually get it. You can’t and won’t be taken for granted anymore.
You have a life too!
You can’t always put your life on hold for other people. There are things you need to do for YOU. Your errands, your chores and your days are just as important as theirs. Do your thing first. If you don’t, you’ll kick yourself in the bum for it at the end of the day. Oh, you know you will.
Who needs more stress in their life?
As soon as you say yes to something you really don’t want to do, anxiety, anger and stress kicks in. Here we go again. Do you like that feeling of frustration? I didn’t think so. Try saying NO next time and notice how you feel. I guarantee it won’t be stress. There may be a tinge of guilt, but it will pass and you will feel free.
Make time to rest and relax.
If you always say yes, when are you ever going to have time to recharge your batteries and decompress? Your health is very important. Physical, mental and emotional health. You need to look after number 1. That’s you! People who care about you, will care about your health too.
You’re making room for more yesses.
Yes! Let’s go for ice cream. Yes! Would you like to go on a fun little day trip with me? Yes! Do you feel like going to the movies tonight? Yes! More NO’s to things you don’t want to do and more YESSES for things that are fun.
Say goodbye to the time vampires.
These are the people that take advantage of you and suck the life out of you by constantly needing your help. They continuously use you for gain because they are too afraid to do things themselves. Get rid of them. They will have to grow up one day.
Teach someone a valuable lesson.
If you are always helping Sally out of a jam, she will never learn how to deal with difficulties and situations as they arise. When you allow her to figure it out on her own, she will grow, learn and be stronger. Say NO and kindly direct her to a resource that she can use to help herself.
More time for family and friends.
The more time you spend catering to others, even when you don’t feel like it, the more time you lose away from the ones that you care most about; your family and friends. They will be there no matter what, but think of the things you might be missing out on because you couldn’t say NO to Mrs. Jones, again.
Open the door for others to say yes.
When we start saying NO to people, they will have to look to others for help. The ones that haven’t said yes will have to step up to the plate. Let them start helping too so they can feel some sort of satisfaction.
Being assertive is a great trait to have.
When we learn how to assert ourselves properly, our self-confidence grows which, in turn, attracts more like minded people. Assertively saying NO makes us feel like we have control of our lives again. That’s a good thing. Careful not to mistake it for aggressiveness.
Do you have a hard time saying NO? How does it make you feel when you do? Share your thoughts below.