You want to stop pretending to be who you’re not.
You want to be honest with everyone you meet. You want to be … you.
But there’s one big problem – Do You Honestly Know Who You Are?
Blog readers are at an advantage. When I visit a new blog, one of the first things I do is read the “About Me” page. This is where the blogger tells you all about himself, so you know who you’re connecting with. You discover his qualifications, his skills, his hopes and aims for his blog. You learn about his family perhaps, his successes and failures, all there on your screen. All out in the open. Warts and all.
But it’s not like that for you, is it! You don’t have an “About” page. When people meet you, they can only form an opinion about you from the outside, the first impression, and as we all know, first impressions can be so wrong. They only show the ‘shell’ of the person, not what’s going on inside.
Here’s How To Discover The Real You, Starting Today
1. Look in the mirror.
- What do you see?
- What can you tell about you, from the expression on your face?
- Do you like what you see? If not, why not?
- What do you want to change about who you see? Is that possible or are you simply being unrealistic?
What you see in that mirror is what everyone else sees. But is that the real you?
2. Answer these 10 questions, honestly.
- What do you love?
- What do you hate?
- What do you wish for? Take a look at Steve’s ‘Make A Wish’ page and add yours, before you forget.
- What would you do with 24 hours if this was your last day ever?
- What is your burning ambition?
- What is your dread?
- What are you hiding?
- What are you afraid of?
- What are you most proud of?
- What would ‘make your day’ today?
Now you’re starting to get to know ‘you’!
3. Come out from your hiding pace.
We all hide from ‘stuff ‘ about ourselves that we don’t want to admit to. We’re in denial.
Are you hiding from -
- your feelings
- your emotions
- your disappointments
- your anger
- your hopes
- your dissatisfaction
- your happiness/sadness
- your unfulfilled dreams
- your failures
It’s time to come out from hiding. It’s time to start to accept who you truly are and enjoy it without embarrassment.
Your real ‘you’ must -
- Start to say ‘yes’ when you want to, even when it’s a bit scary.
- Start to say ‘no’ when you want to, if you feel taken for granted.
- Choose how you spend some of your time, even if it’s only 10 minutes to yourself.
- Choose to be ‘unavailable’ if you’re doing something you enjoy. Let the message go to voice mail. If it’s urgent, they’ll call again. You could even, (shock horror), leave your phone at home… sometimes…
- Let out that ‘imprisoned child’ within. Giggle more, go skating/sledging/exploring with a child or even with an adult friend! Enjoy ‘doing childlike’ things. Who says you have to ‘grow up’!
- Stop hiding your anger. I don’t mean have a raging row, but start to show how you truly feel. Tell people when you disagree, when you’re not happy with their behavior.
- Don’t agree in order to be popular. You end up feeling resentful, knowing you’re not being true to the real you. You’ll earn respect that way and perhaps people won’t try to take advantage of you so often.
- Stop ‘putting up’ with unacceptable behavior. Learn to be assertive rather than simply going with the flow.
- Understand that’s it’s OK to be selfish. You need to meet your own needs before you can meet the needs of others. There’s no need to run round in ever decreasing circles, at everyone’s beck and call. Your needs are equally valid. True!
How about you?
- Do you feel as if you’re hiding away in your shell, like a snail?
- What do you stop doing simply because you want to please people?
- Which aspect of the ‘real you’ will you work on first?