How To Make A Quantum Leap

About Steven Aitchison

I am the creator of Change Your Thoughts (CYT) blog and love writing and speaking about personal development, it truly is my passion. There are over 500 articles on this site from myself and some great guest posters.
If you want to learn more about my products you can check out Steven Aitchison's Products or check out my books and Kindle books on Amazon

Change, in any form, can be hard. We have all changed either by force or naturally to get to where we are today. However, what if we want to go farther than we have in the past, what if we would like a better life, a better relationship, more money, to start our own business or just be a stronger person? We have to make a quantum leap in our minds, hearts and souls.

We have to make a concerted effort to change parts of our life. Most of us want to change some aspect of our life, but find it difficult for one reason or another. Change means doing some work on yourself, it means growing as a person, and maybe discovering a few things about yourself you would rather not know. This is the reason a lot of people live within their comfort zones, it’s easier than having to challenge yourself and make the changes necessary to live a happier life.

Forced change Vs desired change

Forced change, however harsh, can be easier than desired change, as the change is taken out of your control, you have no choice but to change your life in some way. For example, if you lose your job you are forced to change your life in some way, if you get divorced you are forced to change. Desired change is like a dream, it seems a nice little daydream that you can think about as you drive your car to work, unless you have just begun to drive in which case you will need to concentrate on the driving as you won’t have time to daydream: experienced drivers can of course drive unconsciously. Seriously, many people view desired change as a pipe dream.

What you have to decide in your life is: Do I like the pipe dream simply because I like having something to dream about or do I really want the pipe dream in my life?

Here is where we can talk about changing any aspect of your life. It’s called the three pillars of change.

The Three Pillars of a Quantum Leap

Desire

One of the first things you have to ask yourself is: is my desire to change strong enough to make an effort?

Only you can answer this, however, here are a few questions that should help you answer that question:

* How long have you wanted to make this particular change?

* Have you done anything about it up until now?

* What are you willing to sacrifice to make the change?

* Is it going to affect others in a significant way?

* What would it be like when desired change happens?

You can’t measure desire on any kind of scale as it is purely subjective, but asking yourself the questions above will at least give you some indication of how strong your desire is. The questions will also help you look at the desired change in an objective way – but you have to be 100% honest with the answers.

Belief

Belief is a strange creature, without belief we would not be the person we are today. Our whole life has been shaped by our beliefs from a very young age. The subject of belief is my passion and it amazes me how many people don’t question their beliefs about their life, from religion to why they listen to a certain radio station. A lot of our beliefs have been instilled in us from an early age and we saunter along quite happily not questioning them, until the day comes when we are forced to question them.

Beliefs are a powerful force, this is why Hitler was able to get into power as he installed his own beliefs into millions of Germans, it’s how big brands like BMW can ask, and get, us to pay $100,000 for a car, it’s how some of us are extremely confident and some of us have very low self esteem. We have all been led to believe certain things as we have grown up and some of the beliefs are outdated.

If you want to change an aspect of your life you have to really believe you can do it. Once you know you have the desire and you want to go for it, you have to install the belief pattern to make the change.

Installing a belief

This might sound a little crazy: how on earth can we install a belief? well, if you think about it all the beliefs you have at this very moment have been installed in some way. There are two steps to install a belief: rote learning and evidence.

Rote learning is basically when you tell yourself over and over again that something is true. However, this is not enough to install a belief, if it were, I would be able to fly without the help of British Airways. The other part of installing a belief is evidence: you have to find evidence to make the new belief believable.

For example, for years I used to believe I wasn’t intelligent, my report cards said so, my teachers said so, my friends said I was a bit slow, I was no good at English, Maths or any other subject. I had lots of evidence to prove that I wasn’t intelligent and I looked for more and more ways to confirm it. It didn’t occur to me to look for evidence that I was intelligent. That didn’t come until I was about 17, when I questioned my beliefs. I then found evidence to support my new belief: I was good at history, I loved reading, I loved writing, I loved having conversations about how the mind worked, people were telling me that I was good at using computers, etc etc.

So installing a new belief really is simple, all you have to do is repeat the belief to yourself over and over and then go out and find evidence to support the belief. Think that’s oversimplifying it? try it for yourself.

Passion

Once you have the desire and you have installed the belief, the passion will come a lot easier. When you have the passion you will have the drive to keep going, you love what you are doing, and it doesn’t seem like hard work even though you may be putting in eighty hours a week to make your desire happen.

Passion can’t be learned, but it can be harnessed. The simple fact that you love doing something and love learning as much as possible about it will keep your passion alive as long as you want it to be alive. There might come a time when the passion burns out and leaves you altogether but that will be a choice.

Conclusion

 

Think about something you’d love to change about yourself, look at the three tenets above and work your way through a new belief you want to install. Do it for only 1 belief at a time to start with, and then progress from there.

Are you willing to take a quantum leap?

Some Amazing Comments

comments

Comments

  1. I found the hardest beliefs to eliminate are the ones I developed through personal experience. My inability to make money has placed me in such poverty that I am hungry & cold & now have an illness that prevents me from working! I know I have issues to do with success & knowing they are false is not eliminating them. I am facing serious consequences if things don’t change for the better. One ridiculous belief is that when the struggle is over there’s nothing left to be done as if it’s the end of my life movie. It really feels that way. Another is that I was never able to make money – could work at the same place as other successful people & make a pittance. Obviously I was sabotaging myself all along for some reason there.
    Laura

  2. Brilliant post, Steven. I can totally understand the 3 pillars you mentioned here – Desire, Belief, Passion. All 3 had contributed a great deal in my career change and hopefully, my personalities as well. :-) I love the title Quantum Leap, not to mention I do love that series back in the old days.

    @wchingya
    Social/Blogging Tracker
    .-= Ching Ya´s last blog ..How To Receive Notification for New Responses in Facebook Discussion Board =-.

  3. Change is always my way forward and enjoy it. Although, I do know a few people who would fine this info useful.
    .-= Craig Thomas´s last blog ..The New ABC’s of Success: Always Be Creating =-.

  4. Steven,

    It is indeed amazing how our beliefs rule our lives. I’ve often thought that the most powerful people are the ones who believe in themselves. They can’t be stopped.

    I think what limits a lot of people is that they don’t believe they deserve success or happiness. Like you mentioned, beliefs can start at a very early age. And the people who start off with negative beliefs about what they deserve need to re-program their minds like you did or the destructive pattern is unlikely to stop.
    .-= Greg Blencoe´s last blog ..Join me in the Michael Losier law of attraction community =-.

  5. A very intuitive way to break down the thought process of making that quantum leap. I can’t agree more with your components here. What about self-discipline? Do you see that as a necessity once those foundational components that you list are taken care of? I think execution is what gets us there and self-discipline may be the path – but it takes so much work to cultivate and keep it going…..!

  6. Hi Steven,
    I looked up ‘quantum leap (found jump)’ in the dictionary (yeah, I know…!), and one definition there that stood out is,
    ‘a sudden large increase or advance’.
    I never really considered the amount of energy required to clear that demand. I think I am too wasteful with energy. One minute running towards hopes and dreams, next minute running away, deterred by self belief. I am just starting to deconstruct some entrenched self beliefs that in the real world are laughable, non-sensical, but in my mind are the ruling mass as it were and all too familiar. I can’t accept I should daydream but as i’m not putting the hard work in regularly, I seem to be stuck inbetween. Keep doing what you and beautiful people like Robin are doing, as its starting to occur to me that my beliefs are more consciously being challenged now, and on a regular basis! :)

    • Hi Annette. It really sounds as if you are making progress when it comes to looking at your life and see where it needs to come unstuck, that’s great. I am so happy to be someone that helps you in this process.

  7. That’s one of the best approache/key points to help create change in anyone’s life I’ve seen in awhile, Steven. And, yes, I am so ready for the quantum leap!
    .-= Lana – {Daring Calarity}´s last blog ..Here comes Daring Clarity… =-.

  8. This is a great site! Nice post as well! I am a freelance writer too. And I can say that you’re writing is really impressive! You really can make a person better with your words. I read books at Clapham shops but I liked your post the most! This is really great! keep it up! You could be one great book author if you ask me.

  9. Steve

    Thank you for your excellent post. I have bookmarked the site and will keep spreading your positive and inspirational messages.

    I only a few small points on Desire and Passion. I read twenty years or so ago a book called How to Master the Art of Selling Anything by the great Tom Hopkins. He used the words “ardently desire” to sum up a visualisation process around goal setting. I don’t know why but when I say “ardent” it makes me grit my teeth and really think with great acuity at my target. Over the years I have maintained my desire for lots of things and continue to do so but realise that not everything is within our control and the trick is to kick into touch the stuff that can’t be controlled and focus deep down on what can. What amazes me though is that most people don’t realise that you can’t conjure up desire without a great bucket full of passion. How many times do you hear people talk about their passion for something super interesting and then do nothing with it! Duh. How many lives do they think they have? Just this ONE I keep reminding them so don’t delay; but does it make a difference. A big fat NO. They always tell me that it is a bit silly or wouldn’t fly (in a business sense). They don’t see if they want to be truly happy then they have to follow and do something with their passions. I would love to see a bunch of people challenged about their desires – better than watching another programme about weight loss, or making people look younger externally – but would a broadcaster be brave enough to air something like this. May be a project to think about.

    Best wishes
    Julian of One Life

    • Hi Julian, I think you have a plan there to get a TV show out and show people how it’s done :)

      The thing is, we can’t force our beliefs and opinions onto people, we have to give them a choice and let them see what can be done with their desires and passions. If we show that we are walking the walk then the people will come to us instead of the other way about.

      Some people are quite happy with the 9-5 and coming home to a great family life and having a secret desire to start a business, that’s okay, we don’t need to act on the desire or the passion we have. Sometimes it’s just enough to have a secret wish and when the time is right for them they can start acting on the passion if they wish. It’s like us daydreaming of winning the lottery, we know that we probably won’t win it but it’s a nice daydream to know that we could change our life and help change others lives with the winnings.

      To know there are people willing to show us how to harness the desire and passion we have is also very comforting, and that’s where we come in. As long as we keep having the desire and passion to help, then the right readers will find us in their own time.

  10. Hi Steven, I really needed to read this post! I’m in the process of undertaking one of the biggest changes I ever experienced in my life (starting my own business) and it’s such a challenge and at times really scary. Sometimes I find myself frozen by fear (of failure, the unknown, letting my family down) and it’s then that I really lack the belief that’s necessary to keep me going forward. The desire and passion are still there in buckets. but it takes all three to make it work. Thankfully I’m doing this with a business partner, and when my belief is down hers is up (and vice versa) so we really compliment each other. Still, you’ve highlighted that I need to keep working on my belief, and given some good strategies to do just that. I’ll let you know how I go!
    .-= Topi´s last blog ..Give boring books the flick =-.

    • Hi Topi, I really hope the business works out for you and you keep driving that belief in yourself to make it so. There are always going to be failures along the way, but it’s the failures that make us. Thanks for stopping by Topi, hope to see you back soon.

  11. Hi Steven

    Congratulations for a great post – very succintly put. I think you have beautifully captured, what is otherwise a huge topic, into 4 paras. I think it would be worth mentioning here that the idea itself is quite simple, and I think intuitive – it’s the implementation that can be challenging. Then again, the benfits, the payoffs are so huge that it’s worth sticking with it and facing the challenges.

    The first part about ‘telling yourself’ about your new belief could come well in the form of ‘Affirmations’. The lever though is provided by the second part where you are deliberately looking for evidence to support your experiment. When you look for evidence, you will always find it. And evidence is cumulative – every little bit helps. This is really the catalyst that gives the entire process that much needed boost.

    Thanks again for bringing it out so clearly.

    Cheers.

    • Hi Rakesh. Yes, it’s always the thought of something that is more difficult that the actual ‘doing it’. If we are looking to implant a new belief, which is essentially a weak belief, we instinctively look for evidence of it to make it more believable. Like you say, you can find evidence for anything so why not use that knowledge to make yourself a better person.

  12. Hi Steven,
    thank you for this post because right now I definitely need to make some changes in my life. I am happy with what I have but I feel that it is time for me to grow, to go beyond what I already can do and I am used to. This should be big step that might be considered a change in some way.
    I think that change is an important part of growing in general and at some point all of us have to make some changes. The best changes are the ones that we want to make because we see a better future for ourselves and not the ones that the others consider good for us (no matter how good those changes might be.) I am ready to change my attitude to many things right now and with the help of your strategy i am sure that these changes will be extremely successful.
    .-= Anastasiya´s last blog ..The Hidden Values of Moderation for You =-.

  13. Nice article Steve,

    Sometimes I think change is a bit misunderstood. As you pointed out, we see it as being either forced or desired, but either way it seems to represent a new orientation. The truth is, life is change. Each moment that passes puts a different frame around the picture in front of us. Life is fluid and yet we tend to imagine that it is stationary, except for those changes.

    So when we experience a noticeable change in direction, what we are feeling is an accelerated rate of change that makes us feel like we were stationary before it started. This does not invalidate any of the points you made because that are absolutely valid. I just feel that accepting that change is the nature of life helps us to see it as less of a challenge.

    If we are in a vehicle that goes from zero to 60 in 10 seconds, it’s a completely new orientation. But if we are already going 20 when the acceleration starts, it’s simply an exaggerated version of what we were already doing. Accepting that we are constantly changing anyway, helps us feel more comfortable with an exaggerated version.

    Personally, I live for change. It makes me feel alive. Personal growth, learning, creating, all require change. I say embrace it, initiated it, and enjoy it. That’s what life is all about.
    .-= Jonathan – Advanced Life Skills´s last blog ..Seeking Wisdom from Outside the Box =-.

    • Jonathan, very nicely put, your comment puts it into a much better perspective – accelerated change, that’s brilliant! I have just had one of those ‘a-ha’ moments which will forever change the way I look at change. That’s what I love about learning, there’s always something new to learn and always someone who is a willing teacher.

      Jonathan, thank you for your gift of teaching, your friendship and your blog.

  14. How true it is that we develop beliefs about ourselves based on what other people say. I was like you and didn’t think I was all that smart for a good part of my life. But I too liked to read and I love to learn new things. What I learned is that the more I’ve exposed myself to new things, the “smarter” I’ve become. I still have so much to learn…which is great. We won’t get bored, eh?

    • Hi Marly, we’ll never get bored :) It’s amazing to get the new lease of life that realising something as fundamental as being intelligent gives us. A lot of people are in the same situation as me and you Marly, it’s now our job to teach people how smart they really are. Thanks for visiting and leaving a comment, I appreciate it.
      .-= Steven Aitchison´s last blog ..How To Make A Quantum Leap =-.

  15. Hi my dear Steven friend!! :)

    This is a great article. Brilliant and thrilling. Right up my alley. It took me right back to the rainforest. I think I even mention part of this (in passing) in my book. About forced change VS desired change. I saw this in other species and also myself when I was living in the rainforest.

    I love both kinds of change. And since I love forced change it, in essence, has become desired change. What I mean by that is that when things happen that are beyond my control, things that are thrown unexpectedly into my lap, I thrive on being forced to grow and readily recognize and embrace the unexpected, even when the change is daunting or scary. And then of course I also recognize changes that I’ve easily (or maybe not so easily) chosen to make. I guess what it comes down to is that I simply embrace change.

    I find this an intriguing topic. One of my pet topics because I recognized in my twenties that Life had this magic way of giving me opportunities that I would NEVER have chosen for myself. Life did this be creating situations that I either couldn’t run from or that for whatever reason I could not escape and was forced to embrace, change and grow from. So the idea that, if we are blessed, Life will throw us curve balls that gives us the opportunity to test our courage, strength, intelligence, tenacity, determination, commitment to life, and so forth. Now, I just LOVE that, even though it can be painful and sometimes frightening or seemingly impossible to overcome, embrace or grow in these situations. For me, they are what INITIALLY have made me grow the most. And THEN they are what later allowed me to embrace and make more bold changes “by choice”. Does that make sense? What I mean is by embracing “forced change” more fully and consciously, I am MUCH stronger at making change by “choice”. I just LOVE that! because the two are intertwined for me.

    I also love what you wrote about desire. If we know this and ask the question you raise, then we can also ask, “What would create enough desire that it would help me make this change?” We can actually actively create desire in many ways, which can give us the impetus to “choose” change.

    This is such a fun topic. You can tell I have also thought much about this over the years. I LOVE discussing it. Thank you for bringing it to light. I thoroughly enjoyed myself. Hugging you, Robin
    .-= Robin Easton´s last blog ..What Does “Naked in Eden” Mean? =-.

    • You are such an angel! honestly you are.

      I never really thought of forced change as a blessing until now. I though of it more as a bit of an inconvenience but one that could still help you grow as a person. Thanks for making me see the other side of it, and for making it so perfectly clear as to why it is a blessing – that is another soft belief turned around :)

      I also love the fact that you have asked the question about what would would create enough desire to help change along. This is a topic and post on it’s own and deserves more to be written about it.

      I feel more and more that this blogging malarkey :) was destined to bring a lot of us together for the betterment of ourselves and to thousands of other readers as well. There is a fantastic network of bloggers gathered here and over the net, enough to change the world with the positive vibes going on and you are one of the ones at the heart of that change Robin and that will be realised when your book is published and the world hears what you have to say, and I can’t wait for that day to happen.

      Thanks you so much for being you.

  16. Steven, this post is wonderful. I truly believe that change, when its in alignment with pure desire, just flows forth. It feels good at various steps along the journey, unlike change that comes from a place of worry about what we should or must do. Oh yes… I’m all for a quantum leap.
    .-= Nea | Self Improvement Saga´s last blog ..5 Steps to Easily Influencing People Without Manipulation =-.

    • Hi Nea, thanks for your kind words. Desire, belief and passion make change a lot more easier and are extremely powerful for personal change. I think we’re all making our own quantum leaps every day.

  17. Hi Catrien. You have put your thoughts into words beautifully, which is no easy task. I like the flow of your thinking and your energy awareness for beliefs.

    I have read your post and have left with a feeling of disbelief and possibly a little confusion. I will write a message on your blog
    .-= Steven Aitchison´s last blog ..How To Make A Quantum Leap =-.

  18. Steven, thank you – I really liked “I then found evidence to support my new belief,” because I agree this is a key affirmation within ourselves. Our new beliefs can be very shaky indeed, and unless we confirm them with tangible support, they are apt to crumple. A new belief also takes hold much more deeply when you first remove the old belief, although this can be very difficult, especially if it is long-held. The idea of breaking our old beliefs can be scary for some, but we can coax our minds into testing a new vibration, a new viewpoint. And as we dance with this unfamiliar vibration, discovering its benefits, we begin the transformation that can dynamically change what we thought we always believed. The foot of Mount Fuji was in a very sorry state yesterday – please visit my latest blog post on the story if you have time. Steven, thank you – Catrien Ross.
    .-= Catrien Ross´s last blog ..Catrien Ross on Blasting Mount Fuji to Bits – Does Live-Fire Artillery Count As a Spiritual Distraction? =-.

  19. Great read, Steven

    By the way, I would never, ever thought you were “not intelligent” as a kid. And I still think it was just a misperception rather than a fact. Somehow, what you projected outside made the others think you’re not “good” at some stuff.

    As for the rote learning part, I was using it heavily back when I was an online entrepreneur. Keep telling yourself you’re good at something will have a real impact. It will not make you instantly good, as the vast majority of people think, the process is much more complicated, involving a lot of re-alignment but in the end, keep telling yourself you’re good at something, will trigger the right mechanisms to make that happen.

    On the other hand, the whole article made me think a lot. Quantum leaps are fun. Really, really fun :-)
    .-= Dragos Roua´s last blog ..How To Avoid Being A Toxic Person: 13 Simple Tips =-.

    • Hi Dragos. I don’t think I was not intelligent, I just believed I wasn’t because I was being told, or that’s what I heard, so often.

      You’re totally right about rote learning being complicated. I think rote learning along with finding evidence for something to be true is extremely powerful. I tell myself everyday I am a good blogger :)

      Thanks for your support as always Dragos, great to have you on my side and vice versa.

      Congratulations on breaking through the 4,000 subscriber barrier. I know you don’t put a lot of meaning into that but it’s still a great achievement.

  20. Kate DuBois says:

    Steve, your passion and insights come through so clearly. Thank you. I agree that forced change certainly makes decisions easier and sometimes the results incredibly gratifying because you had to overcome something you didn’t choose. However, desired change is so much sweeter and the results even sweeter.

    One of the things I’ve discovered about desired change is that it seems to be easier to complete if my vision and desired results impact others in a positive way even more than it does myself. Author Clive Sidle writes so thoughtfully about this in his book This Hungry Spirit. He says when we connect to our loving Greater Spirit (as opposed to our fearful Lesser Spirit) and toward things that reach beyond ourselves, we find happiness and positive contribution.

    You two have a lot in common.

    • Hi Kate, not another book I have to check out :)

      Desired change is a lot ‘sweeter’ as you grown it from a thought to reality and that makes it way more powerful than a forced change, in terms of believing in yourself and paving the way for bigger and better things in the future.

  21. Hi Patty thanks for your comments and the book recommendation, my wife will go nuts when she sees the Amazon bill :)

    I think it can be tough, moving through the inertia in your mind, but the best way to start,as with most things, is to recognise it. It takes a strong person to recognise an internal problem, as our minds tend to ignore internal problems or tries to justify them in some way.

  22. Hi Steven – Love what you say about forced change often being more challenging than desired change. (Which is not to say forced change is ever easy, of course.) I’m fascinated by the process of transition, and one of my favorite books is “Counseling Adults In Transition” by Nancy Schlossberg. She talks about the difference between event-driven transitions (like divorce or job loss, as you mention) vs. non-event transitions, where nothing is happening on the outside but much is happening internally, especially related to people’s assumptions about personal competency and identity. I’ve certainly had my share of those non-event transitions and they can feel very rudderless, dreamlike as you say. A place of inertia. And it takes a whole heap of energy to move out of that place. So I really looking at that through the lens of the three pillars you speak of. It strikes me as a very strong metaphor for the process of change, and a particularly effective way to build a lasting structure.
    .-= Patty – Why Not Start Now?´s last blog ..Please, Bore Me! =-.

  23. Thank you very much !!
    Connect me by any means.
    All right ??
    Jg
    -www.facebook.com/jg2009

  24. Steven: I think you make some very important points in this post that are really helpful. We honestly do need to decide that we want to make a quantum leap, and that we aren’t just dreaming to dream. The reality is that it will take perseverance and a willingness to do all we can to remove any limiting thoughts and that requires a genuine commitment. The information you described on installing a belief was very helpful. Great insights…as always.
    .-= alternaview – Sibyl´s last blog ..Choose to “Live and Learn” and Really Take Advantage of Everything Around You =-.

  25. Steven, I’m also fascinated by the concept of change–how hard it can be and all the mental processes we employ to avoid having to change. The concept of blind acceptance of an idea and then having personal experiences which lead one to question that idea is helpful to me. In fact, it was my personal experience of aging as not as terrible as I’d always heard that led me to start writing about that subject.

    By the way, a really good book on the subject is called “Change or Die” by Alan Deutschman.
    .-= Madeleine´s last blog ..Age Myth 5: Bad Genes Cause Bad Health =-.

  26. Great article! Three Pillars of change —Desire, Belief, and Passion! So true about telling ourselves we can – it does wonders for our belief system! I believe we are capable of doing anything we desire, if the belief and desire are strong enough. Desire + Belief + Pasion = Action. (Super formula; like all other formulas, it works every time). This is the stuff miracles are made from…Quantum Leaps, as you say! I’ve read a few of your articles today. Great, inspiring, intelligent writing going on here. Thanks for sharing!
    .-= Cordie´s last blog ..Spiritual Riddle – This Nostalgic Lover Has Left Me Countless Times =-.

    • Thanks for your kind words Cordie I really appreciate them. The article was originally going to be called the Three Pillars of Change so it was strange when I saw you had written that :)

  27. Steve,
    These are great questions for my journal as I do want to make a few changes in my life. I feel when I really know I need to change and don’t it’ll eventually become a forced change. Do you agree with that?

    I do think we will be reading about your 3am appointments for writing someday soon. It’s happening with Writer Dad this moment.

    Also I think books like the 4 hr work week suck people into believing it can be done over night. My guess is that guy can work a 4 hour workweek today but I bet he doesn’t. Just a few thoughts…
    .-= Tess The Bold Life´s last blog ..Bold Solutions For A New World =-.

    • Hi Tess, I agree to a certain extent with what you are saying and think I understand what you are saying – you know the change you need to make and it builds up in your mind so much that it just has to get out there and this is when the ‘forced change’ comes in?

      I loved the 4hr work week and there were some great concepts in there, however upon reflection I wouldn’t want to work 4 hrs per week I love what I am doing too much.

  28. Hi Steven,

    I couldn’t agree more that answering this question is a key to change –>”What are you willing to sacrifice to make the change?” So many people see what others have and see their successes, but what they don’t see is the sacrifices that that person had to make in order to enjoy the success. Nor, are they willing to make the same sacrifices sometimes. Asking yourself the four questions is a vital step on the way to lasting change.

    Great article and one that I enjoyed reading.

    Thanks,
    Karen

    • Thanks for your comment Karen, I appreciate it.

      I think so many people look at successful people and say ‘I want a bit of that’ then they find out that the successful person has worked 80 hours per week, attended hundreds of networking events, sits up until 2am using social networking tools, sacrifices their pilates or football watching time etc. Success is hard work, there’s no getting around that, but it’s also enjoyable hard work. I got up at 3.30am the other morning and worked on my writing, it may seem crazy now but in a few years time when I am being interviewed about being so successful I will cite the stories of how I had to get up at 3.30am in order to still spend as much time with my family but how I sacrificed my own relaxation time to become a success.

      • I agree with what was written here but I think it is worth mentioning the role that negative thinking and cognitive distortions play in preventing people from achieving success for themselves.
        The old narrative is that people don’t want it enough or are not willing to sacrifice and do what it takes to be successful which is hard work. As you described earlier the enjoyment you can have with getting up early and working on things you are passionate about. The opinion that people are just lazy who don’t succeed is an old one that draws its support from multiple sources of fallacy. One source is the self congratulatory hard worker who uses the opportunity to reaffirm the belief that they are better than others in that they are willing to work harder so that is why they have success. Another is the self fulfilling prophesy of the unsuccessful person.

        This web sight is all about how changing your thinking can change your life. OK so lets change this thinking.
        Are successful people better people? Worth more? What is the measure of worth when it comes to people? can anyone say? I don’t believe so.

        There are certainly people in the world that choose not to work at their goals out of sheer apathy. But this is not the law of the universe. It has been put forward by people who want to believe it. It helps them make sens of their world. But they tend to need others to subscibe to the same belief.

  29. Hi Steven,
    Yes! Yes! and YES! I am so ready and willing to take the quantum leap. I cant wait to start putting to practice all your tenets.
    I have passion under control for sure ;) …i think with passion ….belief and the desire for change comes more naturally. What do you think??
    Awesome post as always !
    Much Love,
    Z~

    • Hi Zeenat, totally agree with you. I think they all go hand in hand and they help each other. You definitely have the passion and I can see your belief growing with every post you make. Thanks as always Zeenat.

  30. Nice post Steven. I like how you described quantum leaps here in terms of making the biggest changes in our lives. Most times forced changes are the changes that we have to make because they are repeatedly forced upon us. Desired changes are the changes that we want to make happen, but don’t necessarily have to do. Whatever we wish to change, we need to make sure that have enough desire, belief, and passion in it to make it happen.
    .-= Hulbert´s last blog ..Jay Leno and Nice =-.

    • Thanks for your comments Hulbert. We are currently living in a quantum leap in this new, social communication world and it’s up to us if we want to be a part of it. Thanks for being a part of :)

  31. Steven,

    A very interesting read. I love the comparison of the forced and desired change and how the desired change is rooted in our comfort zone.

    I too, like you have a passion for beliefs. Therefore, I have a question. Does our belief system have different levels.

    Such as a fundamental level which looks the very basic beliefs that have been embedded from a force of authority, such as mother says, “if I smoke I will die from cancer” and an evidence source, such as, “three of my uncles, who all smoked have died, so if I smoke I will die.”

    Do we also have a higher level belief systems that depends on a series of events?

    Regards

    Paul
    .-= Paul´s last blog ..Rocky Road =-.

    • Hi Paul, great question.

      You have pretty much answered your own question here about the levels of beliefs. There are many types of belief and we gain them from many sources, but if we break it down into it’s simplest form we can say our beliefs come from two sources: Our own experiences and blind acceptance. The blind acceptance is what you were talking about when you said mother says, “if I smoke I will die from cancer” Our own experiences is where a lot of beliefs come from as we get older. This is when we test various beliefs of our own and find out if they are true or not and whether we invest the time into believing them. An example of this, when we are younger, would be If I pull a girls ponytail will it make her like me that’s experiential, you either get a slap in the face or a coy smile.

      Another way we form beliefs is to believe everything until we are given a reason not to believe. That’s how I form opinions about people, I trust everybody until they give me a reason not to trust them. We do this as young children but quickly develop reasoning skills which is why so many people start questioning their religion as teenagers.

      As for a higher level belief. If I understand you correctly you are talking about strength of beliefs?

      We all have different strengths of belief about various things in our lives. The strong beliefs we have about life tend to be related to our sense of identity. Religion is the perfect example. we tend to cling to our religious beliefs no matter what anybody says to the contrary, purely because it is embedded in our identity. If someone has strong belief in Christianity and it was taken away from them their life would somehow seem empty unless it was replaced with another strong belief of some kind, however this is unlikely to happen unless they had some kind of epiphany. People who lose their faith tend to go into a state of depression due to the hole that has been created by not having the once strong belief in their life. This is also why we get so many football fans who are ‘die-hard’ supporters of their club, without the belief that their team is great they would have a big hole in their life.

      Weaker beliefs are more easily changed and all it takes is a good amount of evidence. For example if I believed that the ‘Flip Mino’ was the greatest camcorder around I would have to re-evaluate because the ‘Flip Mino Hd’ has come out with a better spec.

      The subject of beliefs is totally fascinating and there is a lot more to it, for example there are different types of belief, and different theories of belief formation.

      Sorry for rabbiting on :)

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