About Steven AitchisonA lot of us think that to change our life in some way we have to make huge sacrifices and give up a lot in order to be able to change. A lot of the time a tiny change can make a huge difference in our life.
Imagine if Barack Obama had made the decision not to use social media to help his campaign for presidency; he wouldn’t be the president of America today. That one decision, that one little change to use twitter and fFcebook to help with his campaign, gave him the money, the influence, and the followers to help him become president of America. There is no doubt that without social media Barack Obama would not be president today.
Similarly for us, the small decisions we make, and subsequently the small actions we take can lead to dramatic changes in our lives.
I’ve written about it before, but it’s worth repeating. 8 years ago I decided to go to a party at the last minute as a friend was going and asked me to go when we finished work. That day changed my life completely, because of that one action, I met my future wife and we now live a life we love with our two sons.
I thought it would be interesting to hear your stories of how a small action led to a big change in your life. If you could share your story I would love to hear it.
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I discovered hand made soap at a farmers market and then decided to make it and sell it. While I’m still getting it going it opened my eyes to the world of making things and set me on a path to self reliance and sustainability.
Hi Richard, that’s a great story. I wish you well with your soap making venture.
I’ve decided to finally use a todo list. Since then I’m not only far more organized and do the things I actually plan to do I also managed to work 9 to 5 like a normal person. Before I worked or rather stayed online all day. Of course the todo list is just part of it. The decision to work 9 to 5 instead of 8 to 8 was a bigger step but without the todo list it wouldn’t have worked.
Now I can live a life after work again and I actually manage to get more done in less time as I’m not tired all the time due to excess work hours.
A lot of people slate to do lists, but I also love them. It helps to to focus and that little tick after each item on the list is a surprisingly powerful motivator, thanks for sharing Tad.
Hi Steven,
Even as a child I always wanted to earn a Ph.D. Although I wasn’t sure exactly what it was, I learned from the many educated adults around me that it was the highest degree you could you earn. And since I loved school, it seemed a worthy goal for me to pursue.
As the years went by I finished my B.A., M.S. got married, and started a family. When I turned 30 I was sharing with my husband that I wanted to make that childhood dream of earning a Ph.D. a reality. He was supportive, but we needed to find a way to pay for what promised to be years of graduate study.
One night as I just finished teaching an evening university course, I went down a dimly lit hall looking for an exit door so I could leave the building. Just as I approached a exit door, I noticed a bulletin board across from it and decided to pause to peruse it even though it was tough to read in the limited light. I saw a grant announcement for aspiring doctoral candidates. My heart sank, however, when I noticed that the deadline for submission had passed. But I scribbled down the contact information.
Even though the deadline had passed, I called the Foundation the next day. That’s the one action that lead to my eventually being accepted for a doctoral grant that for four years paid my tuition, books, research expenses and provided me a modest monthly stipend.
Flora M Brown, Ph.D. recently posted..The Top 5 Ingredients in a Happy Marriage- and Romance Isn’t One of Them
Wow, Flora, or should I say Doctor
What a fantastic story to share. It’s stories like this I was hoping to find, thank you for sharing it.
Several years ago I attended this live event which focused on financial success. I wasn’t very impressed with the content and decided to leave early. However, on my way out I met someone I hadn’t seen for while. We started talking and I decided to stay at the event till its conclusion. At the end of the event my friend introduced me to a friend who was a Life Coach. We began talking and she shared stories of her experiences coaching clients. This got me curious about Life Coaching. And 12 months later I obtained my Life Coaching qualifications.
Another significant moment occurred when I created a Mind Map for a friend of mine. This was a plain paper Mind Map that summarized a course that he was conducting. He loved the Mind Map so much that he asked me if I could create them on the computer so that he could sell them at the course he was running. I resisted at first, however later decided to give it a go, and I’m glad I did because the Mind Map was a huge success. This of course got me thinking about creating Mind Maps about Personal Development topics and about the Life Coaching process, which eventually lead me to launching my own website built around Mind Mapping and Self-Improvement information.
Hi Adam. It always amazes me the little, seeming, coincidences that happen in life like you meeting an old friend started a whole new career for you.
Your site looks great, and looking at the stats I know a lot of readers have checked it out as well.
thanks for sharing your stories
I have many but remember I’m a Baby Boomer
I think going to see a therapist and continuing until I made the changes I wanted had an impact on myself, children and spouse. Now that’s big but it began with a small choice to go and the second choice of commitment to action.
Then it would have to be the decision to quit smoking, which led to replacing it with running which led to not eating red meat.
One good small choice quickly leads to another and snowballs into change.
I think taking medication for my ADHD has probably made the most significant change of all because without it I don’t function well. Some don’t believe in meds but it works for me.
Thanks Steven for getting me to think about this…wow I’m happy with myself;)
Hi Tess, thanks for sharing your stories, you’ve come a long way and it’s great to hear your stories about change and your process to get to where you are today.
I was attending an 8-day workshop focused on “Leadership” — being the leader of your life. I was living in Long Beach California at the time and the workshop was in Pacific Palisades. That meant morning traffic LA-style to get to the workshop. I decided to avoid the daily “traffic problem” by leaving at 5:30 am (when there’s only moderate traffic in LA) and go to the gym in Santa Monica, then go to the workshop in Pacific Palisades which would be against the incoming traffic from Malibu, etc. That meant I needed to bring my breakfast and lunch. O.K. No problem.
The problem was after the workshop at 5:30. No food. Traffic LA-style. Eat at a restaurant? Drive home and fix dinner? After 3 or 4 days of this evening ambivalence and irritation at low blood sugar and 3-4 days of awesome learning about “being the leader of your life”, it’s 8:30 at night. I’m home and I think “Oh I need to make lunch and breakfast for tomorrow.” Then my next thought is that Whiney, 7-year old “I don’t want to!” with all the negative energy of a 7-year old that doenst’ want to clean up his room or whatever else his chores are.
I noticed this negativity and stopped. “Wait a minute. I WANT to have my lunch tomorrow. I WANT to have my breakfast tomorrow. Who’s the ‘leader’ of my food? H-m-m-m? I WANT to be ‘The Leader of My food’” and I DECIDED in that moment to henceforth be the “Leader of my Food”. that was the decision that led to a Big Change in my life. As I internalized “being the leader of my food” over the next days and months, I realized that my former “mindset” had been “taking care of my food” as a CHORE (something I was “supposed to do” as a good adult) and when I’d been married I’d “abdicated” the responsibility for MY food and nutrition to my spouse (both times). I HADN’T been the leader of my food at all. I also soon realized that “being the leader of my food” was really, really basic and it has led to becoming a much, much better “leader of life” in all other areas of my life that matter.
Thanks for asking Steven. Great blog you have!
Tom Huntington
Tom Huntington recently posted..Make the Effort to Be Open to Learning Every Moment
Hi Tom, thank you for sharing this with us. It sounds like a great course you were on and I am glad you found the internal leader in you.
Mine is similar to yours, Steven. I was on a discussion listserv (email list) in the late 90s and one of the other guys there started a website to help people find email penfriends. I clicked through in a moment of idle curiosity, to take a look at what he was doing, and found the profile of a very interesting-sounding person who (like me) wasn’t looking for a romantic relationship, just for a friend.
We became friends and, several years later, married.
Mike Reeves-McMillan recently posted..7 Steps to Help You Take Confident Action
Wow!, I love this story Mike, we often find love in the places we least expect it. Thanks for sharing.
It’s hard to pick one pivotal moment in life that has significantly altered my future. I would have to say that relationship decisions, along with times that I followed a passionate pursuit have been most impacting. I agree that one choice we make can have a serious impact on subsequent decisions, and many other areas of our life. I have learned to try and follow my gut instinct or intuition, along with using logical decision making, though these are at time are in conflict. I think the main realization, is that everything we experience has an impact on us, whether explicit or not, and knowing this can start to help us direct our decisions.
Hi Joe. I think learning to trust our gut instinct and making it work hand in hand with logic can be extremely powerful.
My life changed after joining a 10 days meditation camp. After that I did many 10 days of similar courses. This indeed changed my relationships with my family, friends, health and finances. This helped me to understand my own nature and how it was affecting me. I became a detached observer within and without. I have learned to live happily and positively.
Vandana recently posted..Oh God Why Is She So Insecure Part – II
Hi Vandana, I love the stories of how we change from the inside by way of meditation or reflection and yours seems like a profound change. Thanks for sharing.
I think the one that sticks out the most occurred in college. I think the reason I remember it the most is because the event was so small (just a conversation with a friend), but what came out of that conversation literally changed the course I was taking in an instant. I became much more serious and focused about school and everything just seemed to fall into place from that moment thereafter. Of course there were challenges and obstacles that I faced, but I was clear what direction I wanted to head and knew I was going to have to be continually disciplined and dedicated to reach it. The funny thing is that I highly doubt my friend even remembers that conversation. Thanks for the trip down memory lane
Hi Sibyl, you’ve left us hanging a little, what was the conversation?
Great to hear that your mind clicked into place after the conversation. Thanks for sharing.
I was wondering the same thing, Steven. What’s the conversation?
Nea | Self Improvement Saga recently posted..Inspirational Words- Personal Growth and Success
One thing that I learned was that the way you present yourself makes a huge difference to peoples perception of you (obvious, huh?)
When I learned that, I started to dress more appropriately and presentable. It has had a huge impact on the people around me, and the way they deal with me. Plus, nothing builds confidence like a nice suit!
Daniel Rose recently posted..Publicly Owned to Publicly Traded — Queensland Rail
Hi Daniel, great lesson here. As sad it it sounds we are judged immediately by what we wear and of course how we wear it.
My life changes after going to a public talk on meditation. It has never been the same since – in a wonderful way!
It’s so inspiring to read people’s stories. And nice to hear how you met your wife. Thanks for raising the question.
Sandra Lee recently posted..Sunday reflection- we are what we think
Hi Sandra, thanks for sharing your story. I love reading stories of change and how the small things in life have really made us the person we are today.
Steven,
Reading the newspaper.
On a particular day several years ago – reading the newspaper and seeing an ad for a job. And in eventually taking that job, also a move from where we were to a whole new area – and one we very much love living in.
Had I been looking for some change a week later, we would very, very likely not be where we are today. And that reminds me how what seems like it might be insignificant can really be quite the opposite (like reading a newspaper…)….
Love the story of you and your wife!
Lance recently posted..Sunday Thought For The Day
Hi Lance, this is another great story and another illustration of why following your instinct can lead to huge changes. Thanks for sharing this.
Hi Steven,
Great idea… I found a book on the street called, “how to get rich in real estate” by Robert Kent. This was right after I had made up my mind to get out of public school teaching and become a real estate developer. I followed the guidelines set out in the book and the very first income property I purchased was for sale by one, Robert Kent.
Once our mind is made up all sorts of events and circumstances come together to support us… its called “Providence moving too.”
Rob, that is amazing, honestly what a great story. I think once we see the goal in our mind we do start to notice things around us that will lead to the goal. Thanks.
As long as you take some sort of positive action and progression to you field of dream you’ll make it. Just make sure you persist like Edison.
Hi Jonathan, it’s all about persisting, never giving up and never stop taking action on the little things in life.
Hi Steven,
I was invited to attend a lecture given by a monk from a very prestigious order in India. Initially, I did not want to go and almost cancelled but I went. That night changed my life. For that monk, ended up being my real life version of Yoda.
Life has an interesting way of taking us places.
Hi Nadia, life is amazing when we change our perceptions and take action. thanks for sharing Nadia.
I bought the book Conversations With God by Neale Donald Walsch. I didn’t want to get it because the name of the book set off my “Watch-Out-For-Organized-Religion” alarm. However, I listened to a friend who promised I would love the book. The book was nothing like I thought it would be and its contents seemed to echo many things I had thought to myself for years. This book changed my life and my heart drops when I think about the fact that I almost passed it up.
Nea | Self Improvement Saga recently posted..33 Life Lessons I Learned in 33 Years
Hi Nea, like you I never picked the book up for the same reasons but was always drawn to it, maybe it’s time I read it. Thanks for sharing Nea and the recommendation.
My life changed in November of 2009 when I wrote my first poem. Drowning, a short 3 stanza poem about feeling the emotions of those around me. I went on to start a blog and have written well over 600 pieces since this time. Writing filled the void I had been trying to fill with every other thing imaginable for 43 1/2 years.
Neva Flores recently posted..In My Dreams I Go Home – Sept 13- 2010
Hi Neva, some of your poems and the accompanying images are fantastic and I am glad you took action and wrote your first poem. Thanks for sharing Neva.
I simply added a bit of positivity to my thoughts, and it greatly influenced my life. Such a simple thing, besides I didn’t do anything physically for it.
Roman Soluk recently posted..Raspberry and its tasty influence
Hi Roman. It is amazing how positive thinking can change our perceptions in life and like you said, it’s such a simple thing to implement.
I was invited to go with some friends to a wedding of a couple that I did not know. I ended up meeting my husband that day at that wedding! We’ve have a son and another on the way now!
Another seemingly small decision was to change my thought patterns. I used to have very negative thought patterns but now my whole life is so much better because I now think differently!
Stacy recently posted..Moving From Negative to Positive Thought Patterns
Hi Stacy, I love these stories of how we meet our soul mates. I wish you and your family (including your bump:) ) all the happiness in the world.
Hello again,
I thought briefly about such matters and wondered if it was the moment I found the courage to walk away from an empty marriage a years or so ago, or when I was feeling ashamed but knew I knew I needed some help with alcohol…but they were too big and related to moments that were then – and this is now – so the single most important thing that has changed so much and will so influence the future is…I have realised I have a brain!!!!! I acknowledge me, more than ever before. Doesn’t sound big I know, but when you have ignored or not realised yourself really exists, when infact I DO, its quite pivotal. I hope for that party or some such event that makes all the difference. It happened for you, so i’m sure i’ll get the proper chance, one day. Until then, I am reminded to count my blessings and am glad to be reminded of such matters. Thanks yet again.
Annette
Hi Annette, this sounds huge and such an amazing journey. Thank you for sharing this and I hope your journey gets better the more you walk it.
I volunteered as a candy striper my first year in high school. I had no idea how deeply I’d feel for others who were suffering from poor health. I felt so blessed that I was fine. Meanwhile, there were these people, some were young kids, whose lives were limited and who were suffering physical pain through no fault of their own. My world opened up and soon, I wasn’t only thinking of myself all the time. This led to my current work as a foundation director and political and philanthropic advisor.
Hi Belinda, the work you are doing is amazing. I think taking the focus of our own thoughts and worries and helping others is a great way to get a different perspective on the world.
Steven,
Many things happen in life as we are finding a way! Once I was talking to someone about my work and career goals to someone, not expecting to be offered a job right there! It was out of blue and unexpected.
Right now, I am at home with 2 kids and that too happened by chance and I am finding new goals and dreams this way. Life is one crazy ride and so far I am learning a lot.
Preeti @ Heart and Mind recently posted..What if you had Golden Touch
Hi Preeti, thanks for sharing your story. I am so glad you are still loving life and learning.
Hi Steven,
What a great question! I’ve enjoyed reading everyone’s responses.
My life has been so full I feel like I’ve lived several lifetimes in one. Rather than one event, I think of coming upon the Abraham-Hicks material and doing the Rampage of Appreciation every morning for about 3 months.
My life changed dramatically. As simple as the exercise is, many of us are so conditioned to focus on the negative. Suddenly, I began to experience waves of sheer joy and ecstasy. Serendipity was the norm. I realized in a very real sense that life – and how we feel – is truly about perspective.
I know you can relate because you are a great example of this.
I love your question so much I’m going to ponder it some more!
Be well,
Lauren
Hi Lauren, thanks for sharing that. I have read some of the Abraham-Hicks, and some of it is great. I haven’t done the Rampage of Appreciation exercise, but will look over this again for more details.
Thanks as always Lauren, you always add more to the conversation.
Hi Steven, What a great question and wonderful stories.
In my life a small action has led to a big change a number of times. One was going to my first Toastmasters meeting over 10 years ago. I ‘m still a member, still learning and gaining confidence, and still meeting wonderful people.
Another was going out with a man I worked with at my last job. We had a great time, went out again and again. We’ve been living together now for 5 years.
A third was reading the book “Successful Aging” about research which shows that most of the dreary, scary stuff we believe about aging just isn’t true. That was an epiphany which led to my starting my blog, called appropriately Age Myths.
Madeleine Kolb recently posted..The Right Stuff Award- Dr Kenneth Cooper
Hi Madeleine, you have made some great changes in your life. I have yet to go to Toastmasters but it’s always on my list of things to do. I totally agree with about the aging myths as well and I know you’re addressing this
Steven Aitchison recently posted..Why Rejection is Cool
Hi Steve, nice inspiration story. Well, for me, I don’t care whatever it’s big or small action, as long as it’s provide me a benefit (again, whatever it’s big or small), I will act ASAP.
Ben Tien
Stop smoking and start physical exercice (same period).
My wedding.
Those 3 are still impacting positively my life, and this on a daily basis (even after 10 years).
I love the idea that sometimes huge changes can take place when small changes are implemented. That is exactly what happened when Wilbur and Orville managed to finally get flying: they had been trying for ages, but then one last adjustment and mankind could fly – wow!
I have two small action to big stuff stories:
1. One day, I wondered, what would it be like to live in a universe where fat is considered beautiful. I’m a writer, so I sat down and did a 10 minuted timed stream of conscious writing about a character who found herself in such a reality. Five years later, my novel Alternate Beauty was published by Bantam.
2. One night, I had a dream about a guy I dated in high school. When I woke up, I followed a whim to find him. I couldn’t find him online, so I joined classmates.com. He wasn’t there (we had over 700 people in our high school class), so I just signed up and told myself that if it was meant to be, I’d find him. Two weeks later, I got an e-mail from classmates.com that new people from my class had joined. I checked, and he was one of them. He was on the other side of the country, but now he’s here–we’ve been married for 8 years.
Tiny ideas and whims can lead to HUGE life accomplishments.
Ande Waggener recently posted..What To Do When Your Inner Kid “Doesn’t Wanna”
In 2005 I was pennyless and insane with 9 children. My mother and my daughter had just died and I was stuck with a bunch of hospital bills so I had to file BK. We lost the house the cars and were living with freinds, where he offered me to use his garage work out of. I was afraid to put my will power to the test for me as the failures I was facing were going to be mine at this point. Up till then I had worked for other people. So I decided to start a business to recover data files and software discs. I was scared but I got on the phones, it was freezing in the garage so I got a buddy heater. I ran a phone line accross the driveway and started believeing in my self. Today I have made millions and am a self made man. I produce over 25 plastic products and recover 200,000 dta files a month. I was scared from all the rejections, failures and terrible people in my life. My dada had left when I was 5 and my Mom drank her whole life. I was not a candiate for success. But one day I just had had enough and decided to believe in myself and try really hard and 5 years later, I live in a hom with 9,000 sp feet, have seven cars, kids in college, getting married and am livin the dream. And all that becasue I belived in myself, Needlesstosay no one belived in me and even tried to stop me and put me down the whole way. But I belived in myself and just went out there and did it. never stop dreaming and dont listen to any of them, just go out there and be all you can be.