I am a Stanford Engineering grad, an MBA, and I am no exception. I use goals extensively, but I recently fell into two traps that seemed logical and made sense, but they were actually giving me problems.
Now, it’s not that I believe that goals are no good. On the contrary, I am all about goals, otherwise I would not be where I am. And it’s not just me – wanting to improve our lives is only natural for everyone on this planet. We all aspire to expand and grow. That’s what goals help us to do. Effective goals are SMART goals. Goals that are specific and measurable. I agree. Specific, measurable goals keep you on track and help you compare your progress. They give you a clear target to go after.
But reality is not rose-colored and it is not as simple as it seems. Danger lurks in the bushes. We must watch out for traps all throughout our path, even in those corners masked as “logical, sound, and making sense”. Acting a little crazy may be all we need
Goal-setting trap #1: Deadlines.
Through 2011 and 2012 I was doing research on why we don’t do the things we want to do. For example, most of us care about our health, yet why do few of us actually take steps in this direction, like eating right and exercising more?
In July 2012 I decided that it was time for me to write a short guide about a few of the things I learned about health and behavior change. I aimed for 20 pages.
Then, 20 pages became 40. 40 pages became 80. 80 pages became 120. In the end, I wrote more than 200 pages.
Similarly, my initial “deadline” was in early August. Early August became late August. Then, late August became early September. Early September became late September… I published the book “Surprisingly…Unstuck” in October. Phew!
In the meantime, I felt bad about my progress. Even though I recognized that the scope of “Surprisingly…Unstuck” was changing, from a “short guide” to a comprehensive book, and that was why I was devoting more and more time to it, I detested the deadlines that I “missed”. This whole deadline thing made me feel unproductive. Deadlines made me spend time worrying about my progress rather than focusing on my work.
But I was not unproductive. I wrote a 200-page book! I should have felt proud instead!
I did not realize I had fallen in the deadline-trap until after I published the book. Better late than never to be less rational and more crazy
Goal-setting trap #2: Grandiosity.
Obviously, I am no exception to this rule.
Once I switched from the one-time big reward to frequent smaller rewards my irritability went away. And my sleep improved. Big rewards were hindering my performance, while smaller rewards improved it.
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Very interesting thoughts here, I guess grandiosity can trigger feelings of unworthiness of the pay-off is too big.
Fredrik H @ Reintegrate recently posted..How to squat – Part 2: 6 principles of a good squat
Hi Fredrik,
I believe grandiosity triggers the fight-or-flight response of our brain…and that’s why it has the opposite effect of what we would expect.
I love how you focus on the little rewards that happen as we progress step by step towards our larger goals. That’s such a fantastic way to look at things.
I’m personally not a fan of developing action plans in order to reach my goals. It’s never worked for me. Maybe I just don’t plan well. Who knows?
What does work, however, is to change myself into the type of person that accomplishes those goals. It may be a slow and difficult process, but the results have been fantastic. They are a natural byproduct of living as one who achieves those specific goals. If that makes any sense.
And enjoying all the little successes is what helps to cement that change. After all, if you’re not enjoying the process, then you’re not following the right path.
Cheers!
Trevor recently posted..Why You Should Be a Meathead – 4 Surprising Things Bodybuilders, Powerlifters, and Lunks Can Teach You about Living Right
Trevor,
You just spoke magic. I totally agree with you. If you live like someone who has already achieved what you want to achieve, then the results will follow
Hey Maria,
Great article!
Completely agree with deadlines and grandiosity. For me, the key to these is two things:
1) Your goals need to be stretching enough to drive your performance while sustaining motivation (too stretching hinders motivation), and secondly;
2) Your goals need to be flexible.
As you mentioned above, deadlines can be shifted if the wider goal has changed. No issue with that! In regards to bonuses, that is absolutely true. Small, frequent rewards tend to have a greater effect that one large bonus at the end of a year.
Brendan
Brendan Baker recently posted..The 5 Whys Template and How You Can Create Sustained Motivation (Free Download)
Hi Brendan,
Thank you for your comment. Indeed deadlines can be shifted. It’s us that we sometimes find it hard to accept that we need to do that…
Maria recently posted..Episode 81 – 7 office stretching exercises to get energized at work.
Good article Maria. What you are explaining in therapy terms is called ‘Chunking Up’ or ‘Chunking Down” – depending upon the size of the goal we are setting it is good to take it in the direction that suits the personality – the person dealing with the goal will know themselves which direction suits them – as you found out for yourself.
‘Chunking Down’ is used a good deal when issues are stressful. The therapist will ask the client to divide the problem into smaller portions and then deal with each one individually. The smaller the issue the smaller the problem.
Goals are always considered good material for the subconscious mind, if we plant seeds in the correct way there, then great results will follow, our conscious mind then relinquishes its power and as we all know the subconscious mind holds the real strength.
Well done on realizing what was good for your personality type.
Hi Joan,
Thank you for your comment. I didn’t know the terminology in therapy.
It’s true that sometimes big goals are inspiring and motivate us to follow through. Some other times big goals are scary and make us fall into self-sabotage.
It depends on the situation and the person.
Maria recently posted..Episode 81 – 7 office stretching exercises to get energized at work.