How to change your life in 60 seconds

Change
your life in a minute

How many books have your read on personal development? How many seminars have you attended? How many podcasts have you listened to? and how many blogs have you read to change your life?

My guess would be that you’ve spent hundreds of hours reading, watching  and listening for ways to change your life for the better.  I know I have, I am a self help junkie and was forever searching for that elusive book that would change me forever.  I was looking externally for a lesson that would change me.  It took years to learn that my life was not going to change from a book or a seminar or a podcast or a blog.

Your life literally changes within the space of 60 seconds.

Some of you will know exactly what I am talking about here and some of you might be thinking ‘what is the clown talking about!’

How to change in 60 seconds

Decide that you really want to change and what you want to change from and what you want to change to.

  • Deciding to change

This might sound a bit too simplistic.  You might think this step is a given and that of course you want to change or you wouldn’t be investing all that time reading and listening to self help articles and seminars etc.  However, ask yourself have you really thought about it?

Changing might involve changing your life totally, depending on your circumstances.  I know people who have literally change the country they live, they’ve changed their friends, they’ve changed their house, and they’ve literally changed their surroundings which show a huge commitment.

I firmly believe that to change a long standing habit in your life you have to remove yourself totally your habits surroundings.  I think a classic example of this is drug users.  I deal with a lot of drug users in my role as a support worker.  The ones, I have seen, come off the drugs quicker and more successfully are the ones who have literally removed themselves from their friends, their family, and their normal surroundings.  They have re-invented themselves elsewhere.  It’s like having one of those fairground machines where the mechanical arm picks up the teddy and you win the prize, it’s been taken out of its normal surroundings and given a new life.

Knowing what you might have to sacrifice in order to become a better you will it be worth it? If your answer is still yes and you have really thought about it and are willing to sacrifice then you have decided to change.

  • Knowing who you are

You know yourself very well and you know your feelings and thoughts about the world.  Maybe you’re wrong, maybe you have a skewed perception of yourself, maybe you’re comparing yourself to people you shouldn’t be.

When I was younger I used to try and be like Tom Cruise in the films Top Gun, Days of Thunder and Cocktail.  I wanted to be a confident, funny, go get em sort of person. It took me years to realise I wasn’t that person; I was quiet, confident, liked my own space and preferred to develop my intelligence rather than my list of conquests.

Who are you comparing yourself to? What do you think other people think aboutyou?  Ask your friends how they see you and what type of person they see you as.  You have to be prepared for what you hear so don’t ask the question if you are not prepared fro the answers.

When you know who you really are and you still want to change aspects of your life. then you’re ready for the last step a changing.

Who do you want to be?

You wouldn’t go to a strange place without first having a route map to find it.  So it is with life.  you have to know what and where you want to be in life before you can actually go there.

You will know deep down if you really want to change.  You will know generally who you really are and you will probably know what you want to change.  Looking at these three aspects of change should only take you 60 seconds initially.

Who and where do you want to be next year?

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About Steven Aitchison

I am the creator of Change Your Thoughts (CYT) blog and love writing and speaking about personal development, it truly is my passion. There are over 500 articles on this site from myself and some great guest posters.
If you want to learn more about my products you can check out Steven Aitchison's Products or check out my books and Kindle books on Amazon

Comments

  1. I think you are right focusing on the aspect of not just the change itself but deciding on it. There is a huge difference between ‘I’d like to’ and ‘I want to’. ‘I’d like to’ means: maybe, someday in the future, when I’m lucky enough or when I have more many’. ‘I want to’ means: I want it now, I’m prepared for the challenge and I’ll do whatever it takes’. I can hear people say ‘I’d like to find a job that I would enjoy’, ‘I’d like to have more friends’, ‘I’d like to be better organised’ or ‘I’d like to go travelling’ and not many people saying ‘I want to find a job that I would enjoy’, ‘I want to have more friends’, ‘I want to be more organised’ or ‘I want to go travelling’.

  2. Hey, I just wanted to say, this part right here: “… I wanted to be a confident, funny, go get em sort of person. It took me years to realise I wasn’t that person; I was quiet, confident, liked my own space and preferred to develop my intelligence rather than my list of conquests.” actually hit me. You have no idea how similar I am; I’ve always wanted to be the vibrant, funny, confident, popular guy that everybody talks to, but you’ve shown me something crucial- I’m not that guy. I’m the quiet, strong, mature, friendly, solitary-strength kind of guy who prefers to work alone. I’ve never been one for shallow small talk, and I take time to get to know people, and visa versa… This brings me to a question: Do you think I could incorporate the chatty, extrovert kind of personality into my own? Because once you get to know me, that’s who I am at heart.

  3. It was been a long time , 5 months and i m suffring i need your help realy my problem is love i m broken i m heatsick i m everything means the disappointment

  4. It’s really good this post.

    Thing is, i’m stuck at step two. What if i don’t know who i am? What if i haven’t decided and find it hard to decide? What if i dare not try?

  5. Kathryn says:

    Interesting blog, lots of helpful things on here, but I do disagree with the deciding to do something is what changes your life. I have decided to do many things – do another degree, have children, get married, and I have also decided to lose weight, and yet I can never do it, etc,can never see it through, not by doing fad diets, or by making tiny baby steps towards being healthier, and yet several times a week i “decide” to change it, to be a bit healthier, drink more water it never works.

    I also disagree with what several people are saying about having kids limits you. i think someone wanted a better career, but it meant she would never see her children during the week. that is not a limit, it is not I can’t change my life, its that she wnts to spend more time with her children more than she wants to change her career, which I think should not be looked at as an excuse but as a commmendable way to approach being a mother.

  6. Hello Steven,

    I’m interested to learn more about your idea and Life/Personal Coaching.

    Many Thanks

    Dewan

  7. Perception is everything when we change the way we look at stuff everything does literally change and agree that doesn’t have to take forever to change. We decide in an instant then begin to adopt the behaviours and actions of the person we want to be first. I have found personal mantras help in terms of jamming it into the subconscious but who you spend time with is so crucial to your growth or not as the case maybe.

  8. hi, just want to say how great a blog this is. im a teenage girl who is…going through quite a bit at the moment. i really needed some guidance (and still do) and your blog really helped. I have a (rubbish) blog but i think i may need your help. if you could visit it i would really appreciete it!! y blog is:
    thesecretlifeoftheteenagegirl.blogspot.com
    i hope that you take the time to visit it and maybe give me some advice…?
    thank you soo much

    Twiggy:D

  9. Amazing Post! I have read every book I can get my hands on and spent years wondering why the things in the book didn’t change my life.

    It truly only takes a moment to change your life. It’s that moment when you’ve had enough, you’re not going to settle and you’re ready to Live Your Life!

    Your post excited me. That moment is the most amazing moment of your life. It’s like being freed from the prison of settling that you don’t even realize you were in.

    Tammy

  10. You are exactly right. I too read every self-help motivational book I could get my hands on. I even watched videos and movies that made me feel the way I wanted my life to be.

    It wasn’t until that moment when I decided that my life was going to change did it actually change.

    Thank you for this wonderful post.

    Tammy

  11. I used to read so many books , I tried many times to start changing myself but , I don’t know what’s wrong with me actually !!

    This article made me relize many things that I didn’t give it much attention . So thank you very much , I believe now it is so easy , the hardest part is the biginning but worth .

  12. Alex Peters says:

    Most of these comments are inspirational in themselves its particuarly important to remember that life doesn’t change overnight although that in some circumstances we wish that it would, for some career women the urge to want to break free from the school uniforms and tunics seems to be the main focus of the day however there are some moments in life we should treasure as they quickly change themselves with the progression of time, life is just far too short

  13. Hi All

    I was in an abusive relationship for years – had 2 children so felt I couldnt change things. I would leave many times but was hampered by my circumstances i.e. had to take a low paying job to make certain my children were looked after and sheltered from the abuse.
    I became stronger each time I left till in the end, I left and never looked back. I didnt do this easily – I planned and made a decision and then stood by it. I made bigger and bigger decisions and went with them.This I did on my own. My abusive ex husband had made certain I had no friends or family to call on – that in a way made me even more determined.
    I now live with my soul mate. I held on to baggage for some years but it is all gone now. My children are grown and I now have a fantastic career – I earn £100K and can make even more decisions next year when all my big debts are paid off. It just takes time. You have to make the decision. You have to know it wont happen overnight. You have to pick yourself up when you fall. Thats how you help yourself.

  14. I should comment on this post. It’s great! I like all your articles concerning the change of life (but not only these).
    .-= Roman Soluk´s last blog ..Our 1st Birthday- =-.

  15. Hi everyone,
    i’m going through a life changing experiance at the moment yesterday everyone i was in contact with thought i was having a nervous breakdown. so this is for Val and anyone who wishes to take time to read it.
    life for me was in a cofort zone but my veiws of a comfort zone have changed all that was have changed my comfort zone includes a list and so does yours we all pick and choose whats on that list if we want it to include something else only ourselves can add it and keep it there if we so choose.
    my list missed one fundimental thing to enjoy and to make the most of what i already have, that lesson has been learnt and will be adhered to.
    certain things will be added to my list but with baby steps and one thing at a time theres no need to rush as long as your happy without happyness theres nothing so i work towards getting my happyness and if i dont get it before i die at least i will be happy in the knowlage i died at least trying.

  16. Hi
    I am a very young 60 year old, living in sheltered accommodation, amounst a lot of elderly residents and have become so use to it now, I’m in a comfort zone, the only people I mix with outside of my home is my daughter and two grandchilren, I also have a large family who I have a lot to do with, I don’t have any friends , I have lived alone now for 8 years and for the last three years, I’ve been taking anti-depressants from the doctor, I feel like screaming most of the time and so want my life to change, but I don’t feel comfortable when it comes to leaving my comfort zone. PLEASE PLEASE can you help?
    desparate Val

  17. you are all crazy, the pages are already wrote, what ever happens its just the way it is, just like the big bang, it meant to happen and did.

  18. Hi Steven, thanks for your response. Yes, a new job would pay a lot more. However I would be working until around 7pm and much later during the busy season. This means I wouldn’t get home until after the kids are in bed. The problem is that I wouldn’t see the kids during the week and also I would be relying on a hired person to feed them dinner, bath them and go through all their homework with them (which is a lot) including dealing with all the many notes and forms I get regarding school situations; projects due/meetings/field trips/bake sales, the kids’ behaviour that day or test results I am to “discuss” with them etc. etc. I just don’t see how it would work. Husband is in I.T. and so gets home late. So balance is a huge consideration like you said. I’m thinking of trying to get a lower position in one of the companies I’d like to work for, perhaps then I can fill a higher position later on. I just don’t know. Thanks for your thoughts.

  19. Hi Nicky

    Thanks for writing in. Obviously I don’t know your life situation. If you wanted to pursue a demanding job requiring overtime, I am assuming it pays more? If it does would you not be able to hire a nanny of some kind to pick your kids up from school and pay her/him with the extra money you make in your new high powered job. This way they don’t have to go to afterschool, if they don’t want to, and you get to do the job you want. However there has to be a balance and it would be making sure you spent enough time with the kids.

  20. I understand that the “children excuse” is not acceptable, however, many of you probably do not understand fully what it is like to have young children! I do not know louise jean’s situation but unfortuntely – as wonderful as having children are – I also feel it can limit one’s ability to change. For instance I would like to pursue a (pretty demanding) career which requires overtime due to the nature of the job but I CANNOT do this. I MUST pick up my children from the after-school care – by 6:00pm latest because I work until 5:00pm – take them home, get them dinner, bathed and their homework done by bedtime at 8:30pm then and prepare lunch and laundry/school uniforms etc. for the next day.

    Like louise jean says I wonder if it will be too late to change careers when the kids are self-sufficient as this is many years away! I am in a secure boring job where I may leave at 5:00pm on the dot and go to Sports Days and kids’ dentist appointments and school assemblies and parent/teacher meetings whenever I need too. Yippee.

    Good thing I love the kids.

    Any thoughts?

  21. When life at the job gets boring and wearisome, wear something you normally wouldn’t. You don’t have to go overboard, but just add that little something that’s out of the ordinary. Laughter is the very best medicine for a 60 second lift. Find or phone a happy friend for a lift. Tell a joke of your own, or ask someone to tell you a joke. Look for something silly on the internet to make you laugh. Rent a silly movie, read the comics. Don’t take life so. Laughter is available from a lot of sources.
    http://www.jouez-gratis.fr

  22. hi

    I agree totally with your advice but sometimes we are blinded by grief anxiety fear and cant see the wood for the trees, have you any way of shutting down that monkey on my shoulder, i work in personal development on a voluntary basis, and preach very well tools for empowerment and am told i can change peoples lives by what i say but back here i am lost, thank you for you help

    rita
    angel love and blessings always

  23. As time has passed the mental making the change in 60 sec is reality, committing in 60 seconds can last for a few minutes, days, weeks and even months ……….not years . I am working on the rest of my life commitment to change a couple things more . All has been good, however, could have been better with the changes I recognize. Changing the environment has always been a given to me. I do not close my eyes and see the black & white calf as my mind is always moving to next mind process to get to the bottom line . Your thought process is good, however, there must be more out there ! Maybe not ! It is mine to change !

  24. Hi
    Sometimes we feel down and we need to do something then we can change our condition to be better. Thanks for your witting, it’s helpful for me.

  25. Great article…spent hundreds of hours reading, watching and listening for ways to change your life for the better.Decide that you really want to change and what you want to change from and what you want to change to.This might sound a bit too simplistic. You might think this step is a given and that of course you want to change or you wouldn’t be investing all that time reading and listening to self help articles and seminars etc .Changing might involve changing your life totally, depending on your circumstances.really its interesting so i like it very much so its gainful and informative so i appreciate your nice views and thanks for this info.

  26. Hi J

    Yes it is totally worth it. Your problems are always able to be solved but it has to be from you.

    Your relationship – you have to really look at it and find out if you really do want it or not. If you do make sure you give it your all. If you don’t tell your partner as soon as you know, it’s not fair on either person to keep it going if you know you are not going to stick around.

    Your job – You are intelligent enough to write a lucid post so you are intelligent enough to go to college and get qualifications for the job you really want, however you have to know what job you want first, once you’ve decided – go for it and stick at it or pretty soon you’ll find you’re still in a shitty job and you’ll be 68 years old trying to struggle on a pension.

    Life is worth it totally and wholeheartedly, deal with the issues that plague you and go for what you want in life.

    Let us know how you get on

    Regards

  27. Hi,

    Im onli 19 and used to think i knew who i was, but now im not so sure, i know im onli young but ive almost been growing up based on what the people around me are like, now ive lost who I am!
    This article has really helped, its made me realise i need to be me and if i want my life to change i have to make it happen, not wait around. But how can i change it, that the question! Im stuck in a job i hate, rushed into a serious relationship im now not so sure about. Its scary to think my entire life has to change to get where i want to be … is it worth it?!

  28. i wish i were blind and if i dont change it

  29. Thank you for making this post.

  30. YOUR RIGHT IT DOES SOUND TOO SIMPLISTIC, THE REASON FOR THIS IN MY OPINION IS SIMPLY BECAUSE.. IT IS TRUE! THAT IS IF ONE WANTS TO BE A WELL BALANCED,GOAL ACHIEVING HUMAN BIENG. IM NOT SURE IF ITS JUST BECAUSE IT CAME TO YOU AS A REVALATION?? BUT ALMOST EVERYBODY WHO HAS REFLECTED ON THE FRAME OF MIND YOU MAKE AN EXAMPLE OF HAS THOUGHT ABOUT THESE ISSUES MANY TIMES. THE REASON WHY THEY HAVE NOT REACTED THE WAY YOU PERSCIBE IS BECAUSE IT REQUIRES A LEVEL OF STRAIGHT FORWARD LEVEL HEADED UNWAVERING EMOTIONAL SECURITY THAT IS NOT USUALLY POSSESSED BY THE MALCONTENT INFACT IT IS USUALLY HELD BY SOCIOPATHS. I DISAGREE TOTALLY WITH YOUR METHODOLOGY ALSO AS I FEEL IT IS POTENTIALLY DANGEROUS ADVISE TO GIVE TO SOME PEOPLE WHO MAY FEEL EMPOWERED TO DISMISS RELATIONSHIPS AND SOCIAL BONDS THAT WHILE MAY FEEL OLD AND HINDERING ARE ACTUALLY VERY SUPPORTIVE AND EMOTIONALY IMPORTANT ASSETS IN ONES LIFE. I FEEL ITS IMPORTANT TO MAKE CHANGES TO IMPROVE LIFE BUT IN A SUSTAINABLE WAY THAT ALLOWS A NATURAL PROGRESSION FROM A TO B WITHOUT DISMISSING OR AILIENATING PEOPLE WHO LOVE AND CARE FOR YOU HOWEVER MUCH ONE FEELS TOTAL CHANGE IS THE RECIPIE FOR SUCCESS.LIFE IS A JOURNEY AND WITHOUT KNOWING ONES ROUTE HOW IS ONE TO HAVE A SOLID GROUNDING IN THE SENCE OF ONES SELF?? UNREAL AND IMATURE. YOUR RIGHT ONE COURSE TOO MANY! WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SELL? UNLESS YOU ARE SIMPLY A GUY WHO FOUND THAT THE FEAR OF CHANGE RESTRICTED YOUR DEVELOPMENT OR YOUR TALKING ABOUT SOMTHING AS SIMPLE AS A JOB OR AN AREA CODE CHANGE OR PERHAPS THE IDEA TO MEET MORE COMPATABLE FRIENDS YOU ARE SPEAKING SO NARROWLY I CANT TREAT YOUR POINT ANY MORE SERIOUSLY THAN A ‘BECOME A MILLIONAIRE IN 5 YEARS’ INFO AD. SORRY TO BE HARSH BUT IT IS FALSE PROPHECY AND VERY SILLY.
    mental health professional uk

  31. I believe that change is difficult because each of us has set up a support system(environment) for ourselves that helps to maintain our current behaviour. Making a decision to change is the first step. I believe that you also have to take a look at your environment and see what may be reinforcing your old habbits. People in previous posts have touched on the fact that you have both internal and external influences that help to reinforce your behavior. Once you have identified what is reinforcing the habbits you can then redirect or remove it or yourself from the environment. The point about former drug users removing themselves from the temptation of using drugs is a perfect example. You don’t invite a recovering alcholic to a keg party or to a wine tasting event. You wouldn’t want to display posters of alcohol all over the house or show off your new Budwiser hat. One of the biggest influencers I found to be was my TV. All the advertising constantly reminding of food. I had to literally remove the TV from my home. I noticed a huge difference right away. I was so bored I began to find other things to do to fill my time. I started walking down to the theater to watch a movie. Or walking down to the library to find some good books. I started going out more with friends to play pool or bowling. Sitting there watching TV just helpled me zone out, not think, and worst of all not do anything. It is true that some people have to change thier environment because they need to find a new way to do things. Most people continue to do things because the do not like the choices they have. Perhaps that is another way to look at it. Don’t give yourself any other choice but to change.

  32. Mark, Julie,

    sometimes it just happens – you wake up and stop being the person you were yesterday. Like the abused wife who decides to leave. The alcoholic who stops drinking. I was the abused partner (more than once!)I have found when you make changes that work, you learn to trust yourself the next time, so start very small. My son is in a bad place just now with no motivation, cannabis induced, and he sets huge, unrealistic goals for himself. the other night he was joining the army, going to university, emigrating to America. That is asking for failure. I just tell him to get out of bed before 12 and read a good paper every day, then add more normality to that, go for a walk. dont put your xbox on before 6pm, go to bed before 1am. step by step. Give yourself ACHEIVABLE goals, with rewards when reached. Cognitive behavioural therapy may help? or maybe accept that this is the life you have chosen, and make the best?

  33. julie i soooo relate to you. i wish i could speak to you now actually. like this blog says, we can decide immediately, yet, knowing our souls, any soul, prefers happiness and peace, we seem to chose the opposite. why. so damn frustrating. at times i think i’m weak. others just pathetic. but i’m hoping, and this isn’t much of a hope, but i’m hoping there’s a lesson i’m trying to remind myself of. i just want to fit in again, i’m 39, used to “deal” much better with my confusion/detachment, had successful career, friends, but self destructing fast these past few years, manisfesting what no person wants, again, unless theirs some lesson, right? anyone? or do i just stick with what i’m always told- change my perspective, stop worrying, etc..so hard..bummer post, sorry

  34. I have been soul searching for years and have just realised I am only fighting myself. I made choices, I chose even my parents to learn from and certainly my thoughts create reality and forget thinking positive all the time, just doesn’t work for balance is needed but I have found the answer to changing your life. It may be simple, but that is the point. If it isn’t simple then sorry to say your just not looking in the right area to change your life. Life “just is” what is and to change it you need to know what you want to put into it. Forget positive and negative, this is all conditionaing, controlling, material behaviour and start realising your reflecting what you are putting out. Energy is neutral and so what we put in reflects…Balance is needed and so to stay in the zone do what brings peace in your life. Fear, doubt and worry are just signs to prepare. Stop creating false illusions, and focus on what brings joy in your life. For the last bit of the puzzle, look for my book being released next month ” a soul awakening “.

  35. I been sitting in a spot for a long time….repeating the same experiences over and over and constanting wanting to change. I have reached the point where I want to, have visualized it, even created a plan of action (very detailed). I do very well for almost 2 weeks and find myself instantly back in my old habits? I have had some interesting tough times in the past year but at the same time I realize that positive thoughts and action are what I need….unfortunately I seem to lack the ‘discipline’ to commit permamently….I’m seriously starting to wonder if I just, well, as hard as this is to say…lazy? My question would be how to teach yourself discipline, commitment and follow-though…help!!

    Loved this article and all of the responses I’ve read…helps me to know I’m not alone in this quest! Thank you.

    Julie

  36. Hi

    I haven’t read the responses above deliberately so not to bias my feelings. I came across your blog by searching google for “change your life”. And “How to change your life in 60 seconds | Change your thoughts” popped up. I, like a lot of people are probably in a rut of there own creating and realise that we don’t like it. I found your words hit a note in me and can’t help but feel shaken slightly.

    After posting this I will read the above responses but all I can say is thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts with me. I has made me realise that I have a lot of work to do and it’s starts NOW.

    Thanks again and keep up the good work

    Best wishes

    Mark

  37. Dear friends, first of all forgive my miskakes: I’m Italian, writing from Italy. I am working on a radio program about “changing your life” and, looking for news and suggestions in the web, I found this interesting blog. I changed my life more than once and I do believe that this is a way to live many lives. To Killuah I wish to say that two of my most radical changes were due to PROBLEMS: the first one, an accident. The second one, the lost of my job followed, after only one month, by another dramatic family experience. Though, I am absolutely sure that our life is a route we start to understand and learn. External events are opportunities to improve and ask oneselves WHY? Why do I have to get through this experience? What do I have to learn?
    The answer to these kind of questions helps a lot, and gives you a completely differnet point of you about your situation, Maybe this is the practical translation of “positive thinking” that (and I perfectly understand) may sound a bit silly to people like Killuah, who is very upset about his life.
    Well, of course I could write for hours but I have to go back to my research. But I ask you one question: here in Italy we have the strong feeling that American people have, let’s say, “a natural disposition” to changing. It it true? Here in Italy people are very locked to their habits, even if most of them DREAM changing, at least once in their life.
    Waiting for you, I send a CIAO from far away…

  38. Hi Killuah

    I can see why you think you are ‘going to be lead into a dark way’. Your feelings are obviously very strong on this matter and it obviously took a lot of your energy to write this in such a scathing way.

    My advice would be be to turn this energy down a more positive path. From experience and speaking to hundreds of others your thoughts will determine your life, of that I have no doubt. If you lead your life the way you have shown in this attack I have no doubt you will be going down the dark way. I don’t know your situation but i am sure it must be bad for you to have left such comments in a public arena. I hope you change your thoughts soon.

    Steve

    • Kathleen says:

      Hey,,,trying to decide on wheather I need a change,,,, change is a good thing but its a bit confusing,,,I had my first child at 18,,,,and he is special needs,,, I have 3 lovely Children now,,a lot of drama later…Im now..(40 years old) I think it could mean change? but its good,,, scary good.
      I have realised though that we actually change alot its called growing I have definately been several different people in my life LOL,,so do I change again or just melow out,,HMMMMMmmmm :)

  39. Some of the points raised here are quite interesting. Even though i’d like to point out something. What if, you wouldn’t have the STRENGHT to change your life? Or if you don’t have enough money to do so?
    The questions listed above are supposed to be self-asked if you have enough self-esteem of yourself and if you really believe in it.
    This is exactly what is about.
    If you want to change your life, but you can’t, what should you be supposed to do?
    I came to a point in my life where I have no means to change my life, even though i so badly would.
    Living in a long pain and agony is going to lead me into a dark way. Everyday is a worse day. Everyday more.
    Don’t fucking tell me that if you WANT, YOU CAN. DONT FUCKING TELL ME THAT, life ain’t a game.
    Enough of the rant.

  40. I totally agree about the comment raised earlier that change is about a mind set and not moving to a different place. Nor is it something others are responsible for (eg children – it lies with you). My issue is that if there is not an instinctive feeling of what kind of change you want (just a general feeling of being unhappy with the current circumstances), how do you go about finding out what it is that might work for you?

  41. Change is nothing more than a decision. Be it a tough one or and easy one, you only need the determination to stand behind it no matter what happens. Fear of the unknown is what holds most from sticking to their decision for change.

    • jiggypig..all be it you wrote this 4 years ago..but i have just read it tonight at a time when i have just decided to change certain aspects of my life..your words are spot on for me..thank you

  42. Hey Great post but, You didn’t tell me anything. You told me I could change in 60 seconds but you didn’t say how!I am in the process of writing a book about change myself and I just don’t think you said anything here that could help people make a change quickly.

    I am a mother of 7 whose biggest problem is disorganization so I am looking for a cure! I need to know how to make a change that will last. I do like what you said about the fact that we can change right back. I don’t agree with you about changing your environment. It’s all about your mindset and your habbits.

    If you move, nothing may change b/c you are and your bad habbits go with you. So before telling people to leave their family behind and start over focus on changing bad habbits, for starters. My book is called Break-Out: how to break out of old bad habbits and cycles that lead you nowhere.

    Sincerely,

    Kendra

  43. youre right ive read those books heard those podcasts i want to change, i just dont know who i am yet…

  44. I have many positive comments to make about the other posts however I must point out that Louise Jean just used one of a series of typical excuses by blaming others as the reason you cannot make change. It is all so obvious when I look in from the outside although I have been guilty of such similar ridiculous excuses myself in the past. Today I am pleased tp state I do not drink, drug or smoke anymore. I did all to excess just a few years ago. I learned to make LASTING change. I have since written a book all about mental skills, tools, tactics and strategies that anyone can copy to make lasting change. Firstly though Louise Jean get honest and real and lose the excuses. All the best Cal D

  45. louise jean says:

    For me to change my life would mean changing my childrens life to the point that they would miss all their friends and we would be more isolated. I can’t make that sacrifice until they grow up then it will probably be to late. It’s easy to change your life if it just involves changing your own life.

  46. You are bang on! The decision to change starts it all. And I find that behind that decision resides a disgust with the way things are. Sadly, behind that disgust is often a feeling of despair. When a person lacks any sense of hope it is really hard to find the will to change.

    With the right kind of desire and then the digging in to understand who and where they are so many people could create a life better than they ever imagined.

    With just the right amount of support from the right kind of person the intentions that lie buried can wake up and flourish. But as you quite correctly point out it is all about the decision in the first place.

  47. Reality Expansions Events Ltd presents to you multiple ways to generate income through our educational seminars and courses

  48. I appreciate the format of your article but i have one question to ask you. If i was someone who needed to change an area or aspect of my life and had identified what needed to change, who i currently was and who i wanted to be, what self help techniques would you suggest? Many people know what they want to change and become but can not action their new found knowledge. What techniques would you suggest to help people make the change. I suggest the real answer is not only in the ‘knowing’ but more in the ‘doing'(taking the necessary action). Please do not take this as a negative response to your article but as a coach myself i have found that simply advising people on what they need to do and then not giving them the tools or techniques to get the required results is very frustrating and non productive(hence the need for coaches in the first place). You are correct in saying that first you must know what it is you want but more importantly you will need to know how to change it. Keep up the good work and may i suggest the next addition to your last sentence “Who and where do you want to be next year?”)would be – “and here are some self help techniques to turn your answers into reality!” regards Dale.

  49. i believe myself just like you.

  50. What an excellent post. I completely agree , no single piece of information is going to change your life without you consciously applying it. There is no secret book or audio that will transform your life without your participation. You must choose to grow and take action to achieve that goal.

  51. Just wanted to quickly say that this is a very informative article. There is some very good self improvement skills being taught here and I have enjoyed my visit.

  52. Steven,

    Big props to you for a great post! So many people know that they “want” something, but they don’t really give much thought to who they will be and what their life will be like once they have it.

    The general belief in success is that once someone attains success, they will have the options to do what they want, when they want. I fully subscribe to that point of view myself, but I encourage people to realize that the things that you will “want” to do must be different than what you are already doing, or else you would already have success!

    – Aaron

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