Personal Development

How To Be a Natural Leader and Influence the People Around You

Business Team Leader
Written by Ashton Aiden

One way might be to buy a gun and point it at them. However, it is unlikely to work, and this will be no positive influence at all.

Seriously – the art of leadership and persuasion is not in forcing people to do something. Instead, the art is in being an inspiration – being someone, whose team people want to be on.

Mastering this art is likely to improve almost any area of your life, as we are naturally, subconsciously attracted to inspirational, charismatic figures, who empower us from within.

Business Team LeaderIn the business world the most successful companies are the ones with the most loyal and happy employees. That is, they are loyal to the management and happy in their work. Even in small groups and societies, there will be a leader, who people follow and to whom they turn for ideas and guidance.

What is the most important quality for leadership?

So here we come to the essence of this article and what prompted me to share my knowledge with you. If you want to feel secure in yourself, to portray confidence and strength of character, there is one aspect of yourself, one quality that you must master. Yes, as I am sure you already know, we must change and improve ourselves in order to influence others. Change can only come from within, and this is the only way to achieve success.

The quality that I want to share with you is called responsibility, and mostly it comes from within. Think about how many times you have had a good idea, started on it, and then followed it through to a successful conclusion? How many times have you said you will start saving, you will start to exercise, you will lose weight, you will learn a foreign language, you will drop an unhealthy habit, etc, etc.?

There may be thousands of reasons not to do something, but there will be only one reason to do it.

Whenever you set out to do something, but give up halfway through it, this means you have lost confidence in yourself and have hurt your self-respect. People in your circle will start perceiving you as weak and unreliable, because they will judge you by your actions, not your words. Every new connection you make will be ‘cursed’ by the subconscious knowledge of the other person that you don’t really have what it takes to drive things through the end. And they will be far less likely to want to build a closer relationship with you or perceive you as an authority in your field.

However, the opposite is what interests us here and that is where I want to direct your attention to. For example, suppose you say that you will take the first step to reaching a certain goal, and you do. Your strength of character is enhanced in the eyes of the people around you. Each subsequent similar action will increase their respect for you, but most importantly – you self-respect will be strengthened, too. They will see you as a man of action and an achiever. They will see you as successful and they will want to share in your success.

That is one small step away from being their leader, from being the inspirational figure that can influence other people’s lives in a positive, empowering way.

What is that one small step? When instead of saying “I will do this”, you can say “we will do this”.

What can I do today?

Identify what you want to do. Consider it carefully. Look at it again. Make sure you have identified the goals you want to achieve. Make sure you know clearly what will be required to achieve them. Do all this before you start. Before you open your mouth. Then start doing it. Do not give up no matter what happens. Banish any doubts from your mind. Think success.

If you’ve announced that you will run five laps of the stadium, do not give up on the fourth lap (unless of course you have a genuine injury). If you say you are going to save money to start your own project or small business, start doing it now. Yes, now!

Put at the forefront of your mind the thought that you will never give up. Keep it there.

At first this determination will be difficult, but gradually it will become a habit. You are training yourself and training is by its nature a matter of incremental successes.  Even if at first you fail, do not give up. If you fall off the horse, no matter, get back on it straight away.

Very quickly this change in you will be noticed and felt by others. They will respect it and gradually you will become a natural leader, a person whose personal example inspires and empowers. The question is – are you ready to take on the responsibility?

Some Amazing Comments


About the author

Ashton Aiden

Ashton Aiden is passionate about empowering people to reach their goals and manifest success in all areas of life. He has proven that this can be achieved in a fun and effortless way through the tools and techniques he shares on his site at, as well as his Complete Change Your Life System.


  • Ashton, I really like your post,and I admire the work you are doing on your website. I have been a brainwave entrainment user for about a year now. It’s great to see how it is effecting the lives of so many people in such a positive way. Keep up the good work!
    I have a website on BWE also. You should check it out if you get a chance! I would love to get in touch sometime!

  • Being a boss is pretty easy, being a leader not that much, which is probably why there are so few leaders around. Being a leader is harder then being simply a boss as you have to lead and leading requires doing something, possibly well.

    As regards leadership there are two rules which help a lot:

    1)Blame privately and praise publicly.

    2)When something goes wrong it’s leader’s fault (who in case then goes back to the previous point) and when things go well is team’s merit.

    When leading a team they have always served me well. :)

    • Hi Andrea, thank you for sharing your thoughts! Your point about the boss and the leader is very true, I agree with it. I don’t really like the word ‘blame’, but discussing issues in private is a great point, too! I do believe leaders have to give an example with a positive attitude and find a way to encourage rather than discourage.

  • thank you for, that you expressed in a nice and clear that how to act as a good leader and how to influence others in such a way that they believe in you accepting what ever u say with open mind and internal satisfaction. sooooooooooooo nice i ever agreed with u

  • Ashton –

    Your post is a keeper. In a concise, easy to follow guide, you are offering a road map on how to be perceived as a leader and gain self confidence.

    Too often we’re told that lack of self confidence is due to fear – what else is new? But you’re right on the mark when you talk about implementing new behaviors and attitudes – and bottom line, never giving up.

    You’ve got a terrific voice – thanks for a meaningful post. Fran

  • People are naturally attracted to strength. Strength of character. Strength of will. Even strength of body. Those who possess this quality will always draw people around them.

    And like you say, strength can be trained.

    We build our strength through challenge. The body doesn’t grow muscle when you lift light. It grows muscle when you lift heavy. Because it’s hard. It’s a challenge. The body must adapt.

    The same is true of character. You need to face challenge in order to build character. To build strength. That’s why people follow you. You’ve proved that you live by your ideals, that you’re up to the challenge.

    That’s what instills confidence in you. And that’s when you become a leader.


    • Trevor, thank you for your input! I agree with you on all points, you’ve summarized the essence of the article quite nicely. We do have to challenge ourselves in order to build strength, and being consistent in the pursuit of a goal is a challenge itself.

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