Man, alone, has the power to transform his thoughts into physical reality; man, alone, can dream and make his dreams come true.” Napoleon Hill
Big Dreams
Everyone has dreams. Some are much larger and more complex than others, but they all have value. The dreams that you have are there for a reason: to be realized as a part of fulfilling your life purpose.
I truly believe that it is our one and only purpose for being here, to create amazing experiences for ourselves and others.
Then why do so many people continue to live life by default allowing life to just pass them by without achieving anything they want?
Fear of Failure
Winston Churchill said, “Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” Well I am not sure it is really that extreme, I do know that it can feel that way. When you are in the middle of that feeling of fear, it can seem that everything you have every tried has failed.
But why do we really feel this way – do we have old beliefs from when we were a child? Do we have some negative people around us that never have anything positive to say? Do we have some past experience that we can’t forget?
Feel the fear and do it anyway
You know when you are standing on the edge of the diving board and you are getting ready to jump, if you take a minute to think about how you are feeling, you might feel some butterflies in your stomach, you might feel a little shaky or sweaty, and you might even have that inner voice chattering at you.
Stand there for a minute and just feel those feelings. Now take a deep breath and jump! You are going to feel the fear that is okay. Now that you jumped and you are flying through the air and you splash down in the clear water. How do you feel? Excited, elated, proud? You set out to jump and you jumped. You were successful!
Now if you take this little example and trade the diving board for a live speech or write a book, can you see how you would work through it?
Making Your Dreams a Reality
You must plan and work toward what you want. Even if you try and fail, keep trying. Your dreams have value. Keep moving toward them.
Mindset techniques:
- Think of what you would be missing out on if you missed this opportunity.
- Make a vision board where you can pin or glue symbols of what you want to see realized.
- Keep a journal of what you’ve done toward realizing your dreams each day or each week.
- Remember to enjoy and respect the present moment, enjoy the journey.
Ask yourself, is this feeling really true? Where is the fear coming from? I like to spend some time in meditation or journaling to really get into where and what? This give time and space for my inner voice to really step through and show me why I am feeling this way.
“Each time we face our fear, we gain strength, courage, and confidence in the doing” ~Eleanor Roosevelt
Action Steps
- Take one small task that will move you forward, concentrate on that task, don’t look past it.
- Have faith, faith that you were able to dream it, so you are able to accomplish it.
- Understand that fear is just your mind’s way of dealing with the uncomfortable, embrace the feeling of uncomfortable.
- Feel the fear, the sweat, the heart palpitations, and just do it; be bold and be audacious.
- Kick fear in the ass and make it cry!
I want to leave you with one last question – if you weren’t afraid, how would you act?
Now that is something to journal about.
I would love to hear about a time when you were afraid and you did it anyway. How did you feel afterward, did it allow a dream to be realized?
Google+
About Lori Lynn Smith
Subscribe to CYT and
receive a FREE copy of
Volumes 1 & 2 of
The Best of CYT
Just the kind of push I was looking for. And step 1 of taking one small task and just doing it – that is exactly what I did last night. And there’s one more small task, which I will do tonight. I’m not thinking too much ahead of that at this moment in time.
thedelhiwriter recently posted..I am a writer
Perfect! one thing after another!
Lori Lynn Smith recently posted..$400 Million Selling Through Mail Order
A time when I was afraid and did it anyway? Told people about my blog! For the first 6 months (at least), only a handful of people knew. Starting to tell strangers was terrifying, but once I started, it was awesome! Energizing, empowering and breathing life into my dream. Oftentimes, the scariest stuff in life is the most rewarding.
Kaylee recently posted..Strap on Your Overalls and Tend to Your Goals Like a Good Farmer
YES!! that is so true, just need to take those baby steps!
There is little that truly scares me anymore. I guess growing older does that to someone. I have left great paying jobs to follow my passion, I have lost loved ones, faced too many challenges, etc…and found that somehow I have arrived at the other side still in one piece and better for it.
Jane Robinson – Art Epicurean recently posted..Your Creative Nature
Totally agree that wisdom of lots of life experience gives you a great foundation.
And add in the ‘can do’ attitude and you are set!
Lori Lynn Smith recently posted..Zen to Done By Leo Babauta
This is a FAB post Lori. I really feel strongly about the concept to “Feel the fear and do it anyway”! Life is about new experiences and taking chances. It involves risk and times when we feel uncomfortable because we are extending the boundaries. This is where growth happens!
Just about every venture in my life that was worth anything (and some that were not) began because I “Did it anyway”. It takes courage to change, heal, and help the world, even if just in small ways!
Love and hugs,
Margo
“It takes courage to change, heal, and help the world, even if just in small ways!”
most definitely true!
Lori Lynn Smith recently posted..Zen to Done By Leo Babauta
Lori, this is so true, “… it is our one and only purpose for being here, to create amazing experiences for ourselves and others.” Living life by this premise makes getting up in the morning something exciting instead of dreading it.
Such great dream advice.
Catherine
Catherine recently posted..My Dream for Big Business
I actually just decided last week to ditch my dream, to stop trying to motivate myself, and to be lazy. But I suppose that for me, being lazy required me to face my fears.
Amit Amin recently posted..The 6 Fraudulent Schemes We Mistake as Dreams
sometimes…. that is what we need to do to get past the fear. Maybe you will find a new dream that is more meaningful to you while you are “being lazy”
Thanks for the reminder, Lori. I remember a few years ago when someone asked me what my goals were I couldn’t think of anything precise, just generalizations. Being specific is key to start working on goals.
yes, definitely, having a very clear picture is one of the most important parts! You have a great place to start from then. You can see why you need to overcome the fear.
Thanks for making it seem so simple – oh if it only were! Good post.
Lori Lynn Smith recently posted..Zen to Done By Leo Babauta
Lori
fear holds so many people back from achieving, or even shooting for, their dreams.
And I think that fear can be cumulative – there are people who won’t try to achieve their dreams because of a crippling fear of failure – they have worked their way up to a high level of fear: the fear started small, but instead of acting, they let it grow and let it accumulate more and more reasons and justifications for ‘not doing’. It then gets to the stage (in their mind) that there is too much to lose by taking action – whereas if they had taken action when the fear was small, the fear would have disappeared.
Angie recently posted..Positive psychology – what’s in it for you?
yes, I agree that can happen. I definitely recommend starting with small things and working your way up to the bigger stuff. You have time to practice and become more familiar with taking more action.
This post has so many amazing ideas. I love Susan Jeffers’ wonderful book “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway®” and it has helped me lots over many years. Sometimes though, I know I need to get past it, but I don’t know how. So when I read your first mindset technique — Think of what you would be missing out on if you missed this opportunity — I was blown away. What a simple solution for when I’m feeling blocked by fear. Thanks!
I know right… it can be quite eye opening! Thanks for sharing a great resource.
Lori Lynn Smith recently posted..Zen to Done By Leo Babauta
Hi Lori – I think part of our “fear” and it stopping us from reaching our dreams is recognising when it’s the Lizard part of our brain going into mass hysteria mode about moving it away from it’s comfort zone.
I’ve battled the “not good enough” gorilla for many years and whilst I’m chuffed w what I’ve achieved – it would have been a smoother ride if I didn’t waste so much energy on fighting fear.
Agree that we absolutely need to keep Dreaming
yep definitely agree, you need to be okay with feeling uncomfortable, out of your zone in the unknown.
the more you can do it the more you will expand your zone.
I’m a great believer in using lists as incentive to move forward and love your mindset techniques.
Have you considered that some people may hold themselves back because they fear success?
oh definitely! and I am hoping to look at that more in the future the different kinds of fear and how we can over come them.
Lori Lynn Smith recently posted..Zen to Done By Leo Babauta
Hi Lori,
My favorite part is the very first action step. Just taking one small little step can be so darn powerful! A bunch of little steps taken everyday will eventually turn into some big things!
I have to throw this little thought out there. I used to sit with my fear before I took action, but now I try to take action before the fear can overtake me. To use your diving board example – Now, I would just run to the end and jump. It is too darn scary too stand over the edge and take a look. Though sometimes maybe this isn’t the best approach, in the end it helps me always take action.
Definitely a great post.
Izzy recently posted..How I Quit My Job, Doubled My Pay, and Pursued a Childhood Dream When I Don’t Even Speak The Native Language
Izzy, I totally think that can work and the more comfortable you become the more you can do it.
I like to think of that as a more advanced step once you are comfortable just taking action, then you can really run fear over!
Lori Lynn Smith recently posted..Zen to Done By Leo Babauta
Good post Lori, thank you. I like the analogy of the diving board. SO true!
Shirley Corder recently posted..My Baby Grows Up
thanks Shirley!
Lori Lynn Smith recently posted..Zen to Done By Leo Babauta
I remember being nervous as a teenager, standing up and playing saxophone in front of an audience…I grew to enjoy it enough to study it seriously and become a performer.
Once you know how, it is possible to channel that nervous energy into the act of playing music and sharing that power with your listeners.
Now I get jittery a few hours before getting in front of an audience…because I want to go NOW, instead of waiting for it!
Trevor recently posted..Blazing New Trails Off Of the Beaten Path
that is an awesome kind of energy though, and as you say, when you can harness it watch out world!
Lori Lynn Smith recently posted..Zen to Done By Leo Babauta
That is excellent and good practice! Totally agree the more you do it the less you “feel” it. You can acknowledge that others might think it is fearful or they tell you lol
This sounds weird but fear doesn’t scare me anymore. Yes, there is fear that exists in my life and my mind. But when I experience it (assuming I know I am), it doesn’t scare me.
I tend to acknowledge it, determine the reason why I’m experiencing it, and then let it go as fast as I can. Obviously easier said than done sometimes.
Joel Zaslofsky recently posted..How One Simple Man Learned a Powerful $16,000.00 Lesson about Detachment
Lori, I think that’s the only way I have gotten anywhere in life is to go into the scary parts. I still have problems getting out of the denial part that doesn’t always allow me to label my hesitation as fear, but I know that it will come eventually!
Bobbi Emel recently posted..Some disassembly required: 5 lessons to put yourself back together after falling apart
fear is really the thing that comes up for me and it took me a loong time to be able to figure that out. I am not sure you need to label it as long as you understand that you can push through it and come out the other side a better person.
Lori Lynn Smith recently posted..Zen to Done By Leo Babauta
Dreaming is the biggest contributor to the evolution of mankind. whew! Now that’s a leap forward, huh? But, I do believe you’re absolutely right about dreams having great value. We’re imbued with this “skill” because that’s what drives us to improve.
When we give up on dreams, as we often do, it can have the opposite effect from what was intended. I believe one reason is that we often shoot for dreams that are not really ours. We see the accomplishments of others and say “I want that!” And the more often we say that, the less we are in touch with what WE really want ourselves.
Unless we’re pursuing our own dreams, we’re going to fail. It really takes great self-awareness to know what we truly want ourselves.
I agree with your thoughts on pursuing our own dreams, if we are not following our dreams and those dreams are not in alignment with our purpose we will not be successful. We really need to do the soul searching to make sure we are on the right path.
thanks so much for you comments!
I like that you have singled out tips for getting into a different mindset. Once we start thinking like successful people, we can become them. We just have to take that first step!
John Hawkins recently posted..Journeys don’t start themselves
John,
exactly what I believe. First you think then you are.
Lori Lynn Smith recently posted..Zen to Done By Leo Babauta
Wonderful indeed!
Yes, all of us have dreams and sometimes we aren’t able to fulfill them because of our own reservations or restrictions we have within. Often times it’s the fear of the unknown or we tend to wonder how and what would the end result be.
I guess it makes a major difference, just as you mentioned in the example of the diving board, that you learn to prepare yourself and give yourself that much required PUSH – the go, which makes all the difference. Because it is when you do that, do you realize that you were able to achieve success and fulfill your dream or desires.
Thanks for sharing.
Harleena Singh recently posted..Is Your Family Important to You
Thanks Harleena,
we have great hindsight right, when we are able to get the things done, we look back and say “that wasn’t as hard as I thought” we need to do that BEFORE we reach the fear point.
Lori Lynn Smith recently posted..Zen to Done By Leo Babauta
Nicely said, Lori!
I love this line: “Feel the fear, the sweat, the heart palpitations, and just do it; be bold and be audacious.”
When we do what’s needed (or wanted) in spite of our fears, and continue over time to regularly face our fears down, we eventually come to realize our fears are really so over exaggerated that we start paying very little attention to them.
Thanks for the tips here. All good stuff!
Ken Wert recently posted..You Were Born to be Extraordinary!
Thanks Ken! Sometimes the toughest part is getting past the feeling of fear.
Lori Lynn Smith recently posted..Zen to Done By Leo Babauta