to change your life
About Steven AitchisonI am the creator of Change Your Thoughts (CYT) blog and love writing and speaking about personal development, it truly is my passion. There are over 500 articles on this site from myself and some great guest posters.
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This is the most effective way I know of to set goals in your life. It shows 4 steps to setting your goals.
I think a lot of us think that setting a goal is a matter of writing it down, thinking about it a few times and then getting on with our life. There is so much more to it than that and in this video I want to share with you the other steps involved in setting goals which will you you a much higher success rate at reaching them.
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I like the video posts…
Step two is the best for me. Once I know why I’m doing something it gives me a sense of purpose for achieving that goal.
Cheers,
Rishi
.-= Self Improvement Explained´s last blog ..Don’t Read This If You Have All The Success You Can Handle =-.
Hi Rishi
Thanks for the feedback on the video posts.
I think we all set goals in our lives but we rarely ask the reasons why and depending on our ‘Learning style’ we will either take action or not.
Thanks for a clear presentation.
Happiness is an internal process not an external one; it’s something have happens inside you as a result of your thoughts, not something that the outside world brings to you. It’s very liberating to be reminded of this.
Hi Dave, thanks for your comments. I think a lot of us look externally for something that will make us happy internally, most of the time it never works like that.
Steven, thank you very much for the practical pointers in your 4 step process for setting goals – breaking your action “down into little chunks” is a strong reminder that you move a mountain one stone at a time. Yet the seemingly monumental task begins when you actually pick up the first stone – and then keep going, one small stone after another.
But I especially loved the courage of the message underlying your advice – that “we are born to find happiness.” I agree with this so deeply, Steven. We are here in this world to find joy, to know joy, to express joy, to be joy. And that joy begins within us – it is there within us already – and we need only tap that source of happiness to transform what we are and how we live our life. Thank you for this joyful reminder.
Early morning greetings from the mountains in Japan – Catrien Ross.
.-= Catrien Ross´s last blog ..Catrien Ross on Reviving Your Passion and Purpose in Spring Vibrations from Japan =-.
Hi Catrien, I love your analogy of the mountain.
When I have broken down my life into small pieces, retrospectively, I see that my vision all along has been to find happiness and it was a great revelation to me. Studying psychology has led me to the conclusion that the human mind seeks happiness as it’s constant goal.
Hope your world in Japan is well.
Steven: Another helpful post and a great breakdown of the steps to reach goals. Sometimes is can seem that what we want is just too big, but when we break things down into steps as you described, it makes it seem much more achievable. I really appreciated what you said about pushing beyond your comfort zone. I read somewhere that breakthroughs happen only when you have daring ideas that you pursue…and the only way that happens is when we push beyond our comfort zones. I continue to remain a big fan of the videos…keep them coming.
.-= alternaview – Sibyl´s last blog ..Choose to Experience Everything in a Better Way By Taking Advantage of the “Time Gap” =-.
Thank you Steven for making that video.
As your introduction said, I have always written down the goals I want to achieve on a piece of paper. I do that on January first of each year actually
But it is interesting that you also mention to write down what happiness will I get by achieving each goal, which will make the reward even better!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this
.-= Anto´s last blog ..Cuba’s Organic Revolution =-.
Hi Anto, thanks for your comments.
I think writing down goals is a great way to make your thoughts concrete and take them from the unseen world in your mind to the physical world, we are essentially creating a bridge between our thoughts and the physical world.
Hi Sibyl, thanks for the encouragement I really appreciate it.
I think you are absolutely right, no change has ever occurred inside a comfort zone, ideas to change have occurred, but never change itself.
The video’s will keep coming and I’m trying my hardest to get them looking better as well
Thanks for breaking it down into simple steps, Steven. Those are really all we need. I also believe our “whys” are extremely important. Know your core feeling that you are going after and want to experince when you reach the goal, focus on it and you’ll reach that goal much faster.
I also loved your addition to four steps .
P.S. I’ll start video blogging soon too, I am learning a lot from you.
.-= Lana – {Daring Clarity}´s last blog ..9 Steps To Get You Back On Track When Things Are Messy + Out Of Balance + Out Of Flow =-.
Hi Lana. I am with you about the why’s being really important.
Be great to see a fellow blogger starting out with videos. I am stepping it up a gear in the next two weeks and my office will look like a photography studio soon as I have added lighting and white seemless background to the mix.
.-= Steven Aitchison´s last blog ..A Definitive 4 Step Process for Setting Goals =-.
Hi Steven,
I have already begun to realise that true happiness begins within. Because this state is an alien one to me, how can any person like me ever reach those goals if the biggest goal post is so far removed from the pitch its literally detached? If you could see the amount of self help literature I own, the hynopsis cds, the poetry of the likes of Rumi, the music I enjoy, for ex John Lennon, what is it about me that permitts me to recognise happiness but not ever feel it, inside? To understand your advice but not benefit from it? The more conscious of this major flaw I become, the harder it becomes as no amount of sugary stuff can take that feeling away. Unsurprisingly my other goals always keep moving or morphing into another hope or dream. This is not meant to sound grey, I am being honest here and am looking to overturn a whole way of living, worse still, being!
Hi Annette. It will take time, but you will get there. You are having to overturn a lifetime of beliefs about yourself and that doesn’t happen overnight. Stick in there.
.-= Steven Aitchison´s last blog ..A Definitive 4 Step Process for Setting Goals =-.
I am impressed!!
Thank you so much!
I heard and read much about “goal setting” (although I am sure there is much more to learn and do…). Yet, it is the first time I heard about the 4′th step you mentioned.
It occurred to me that sometimes a possible non desired outcome of one of our desired goal exist in our subconscious, and it might be the cause for us not being able to achieve the goal without knowing why.
Mary.
Hi Mary, thanks for your comments on this post. You have a good point, maybe our unconscious tries to sabotage us trying to achieve a goal as it knows it’s not right for us, is that what you are saying?
.-= Steven Aitchison´s last blog ..A Definitive 4 Step Process for Setting Goals =-.
I can’t do much more than totally agree with you, Steven.
The happiness external things bring us are very temporary as they are most often a surrogate to fill a void. Once you get used to the new shiny car for example the void is back again and you run in circles.
When it comes to goals and you really go for it as you described, then it comes always handy to have the next one ready in your back pocket. Setting and reaching goals can become a very healthy addiction this way.
Once you reached your goal, no matter how big or little it was, it will give you a feeling of happiness and you see literary the big space for something new in front of you. Just like the first page of the new chapter in your life that has to be written.
Great video! The more I watch your material the more I get used to your accent and this is a very good way of learning English, what by the way is one of my goals.
Have a great week ahead!
Mario
.-= Mario´s last blog ..Experiencing Dave Gibbons’ Manga Studio Webinar =-.
Hi Mario, I agree with you that they can become a healthy addiction. Your written english is very good so if that’s anything to go by I am sure your oral english is also very good, you’ll be speaking Scottish before you know it
.-= Steven Aitchison´s last blog ..A Definitive 4 Step Process for Setting Goals =-.
Hi Steven, the funny thing is that always Dutch people criticize my English. However, a few month ago I worked together with a Scottish guy who were born and raised in the same place as Gordon ‘effing’ Ramsay. We talked for a very long time without any problems.
I keep following your videos as I like your blog and I’m very glad that a friend has recommended it to me.
.-= Mario´s last blog ..Experiencing Dave Gibbons’ Manga Studio Webinar =-.
Thanks for the tips. Goal settring is a matter of clarity of vision (for me). When we can really envision the outcome we desire so that it is sooo reeaalll that we can feeeel it (felt vision), the rest gets easy; we have enrolled the subconscious level of our mind to join in and its power is beyond measure – that is what I believe. thanks, rob
.-= rob white´s last blog ..The Health Care Bill is Confusing =-.
Hi Rob, thanks for your comments.I agree with you, passion brings with it so many emotions that we can use to help us reach our goals in life.
.-= Steven Aitchison´s last blog ..A Definitive 4 Step Process for Setting Goals =-.
Hello I came across your twitter page and I am glad that you are doing this it is very needed and positive….Thank you!!
Thanks for your comment Salimah, I appreciate it.
Steve,
While I don’t think I would have said this a few years ago, I think step #2 is probably the most important. The reason is that there needs to be good reasons for wanting to achieve a goal or it is pretty much a waste of time to pursue it.
I think one of the problems is that we aren’t always good at knowing what truly makes us happy. Sometimes the fantasy is a lot better than the reality. As you mentioned, a lot of people mistakenly believe that achieving certain goals (e.g. getting a certain car) will make them happy. And then it turns out not to be the case.
I COMPLETELY agree that happiness must come from within. I did not really understand this until recently. But I have found that it is so true.
I also think #4 is very underrated. A lot of times we can think about the good parts of achieving a goal without realizing that there could be some negative consequences, too.
.-= Greg Blencoe´s last blog ..YouTube video: Giving away free book and DVD on EFT (Say “Yes” in a comment to have an opportunity to win) =-.
Hi Greg. I have to agree with you about the fantasy being better than the reality sometimes. Real goals are set and there is a plan to reach it and the journey is one of the best parts of the goal, if we incorporate all the parts of reaching a goal then that’s what makes it sweeter.
Hi, just wondered if there was a way to find or access a printed transcript of the vid anywhere ? As a baby boomer, I find I still internalize things I want to learn much better by reading them, than by video. Guess that’s a little fuddy-duddy for today, that some of us still prefer print, but, there it is!
Hi Dott
I don’t have any transcripts for the videos I have made. I may do this in the future as I also like to read. We all have different learning styles so I know what you mean about preferring print.
Nice video. Even though the steps are pretty common now, it’s always good to go over the basics until they’re solid. That’s how shaolin monks do it anyway.
.-= Craig Thomas´s last blog ..5 Big Ways to Add Time To Your Days =-.
I have spent the last two years of my life, going through some horrid times.. I left my wife, through frustration, I broke my arm, I lost my dog, I broke my leg, i lost my home, I got divorced, and had no job.. Why? I now understand why! I felt empty, of no use. On the outside i seemed ok. On the inside I didnt even know what was wrong. I now stand a man, of self well being. I now understand why? I have mastered my self, my thoughts and creativity and have evolved into a very special person. I am now stepping out into a beautiful future, a life full of happiness. If you feel the same, have faith.. and I’m sure you’ll get your answer!
Kind Regards
Lex
Hi Steve, this is a rich post. I’ve watched it twice now and both times have been rewarded with your excellent insights.
Effective goal-setting is a critical life-skill, and something that can be constantly improved upon – as you so elegantly demonstrate.
The idea of future-pacing the achievement of the goal is powerful. It’s something I do a lot – for two reasons. Firstly, to experience the achievement of the goal from a visceral perspective, and secondly, as a way of ‘trying on’ the goal to see if it is indeed worth pursuing. This saves a lot of time and resources chasing empty goals.
Best to you, Steve.
Shine on.
Robin
.-= Robin Dickinson´s last blog ..Business success interview with Andrew Dickinson =-.
Great work, Steven
I admire the way you stabilized on this constant high-value flow of inspiring videos. You’re on the right track here, my friend
.-= Dragos Roua´s last blog ..Being A Digital Nomad =-.
Thanks Dragos, I always appreciate your input in business and personally. Take care buddy.