Line BreakAuthor: JC (1 Articles)
JC is the author of JCDFitness, a resource where he writes about fat loss, building muscle and his No-BS Approach to Looking Great Naked. Follow him on Twitter.
Change – According to Merriam Webster, one definition of the word is to undergo transformation, transition, or substitution. Another is to make different.
As humans, it’s common for us to resist change in any form or fashion. If you study the lives of people throughout the world, you will find they’re deeply seated in a ton of ritualistic, routine-based functioning.
In light of the evidence, the old saying ‘we are creatures of habit’ is infinitely factual.
Now most of us are resistant to change. In general, I’ve yet to find a single person who is completely fine with changes in life, whether they be large or minute. We are resistant to change because it makes us uncomfortable; and no one wishes to revel in discomfort.
However, aspects of our lives are going to change whether we like it or not. We age, lose loved ones, change jobs, get fired, etc. Nothing in our world will be consistent forever. Change, in general, is usually a struggle against every fibre of our being. We’d rather live comfortable, meaningful lives without any disruption to our daily routine.
The great part about change, though, is our ability to learn and grow as a result of having to adapt. In fact, change is really the only thing we will ever experience on a consistent basis. So, while our struggles with change may seem cumbersome, we must accept and learn from them.
Embrace All Aspects of Change
From the time you entered this world, you’ve experienced a multitude of changes and you will continue to experience them until you return to the earth. What we must learn is that while change is inevitable, we don’t have to be so full of resistance. Change can be a great thing, if your perception is altered a bit.
In order to do this, we must first look at our struggles that pertain to whatever changes you may be experiencing in life. The struggles are there for a reason – to teach you something. If you never struggled, you’d never develop into a better person.
Think about any previous adversity you may have experienced and eventually surfaced from. If you cannot claim to have learned something or at least know yourself better as a result, I would like to take your pulse.
Therefore, every time you are presented with a major change in life, you must learn to embrace the struggle for all it’s worth and know without a doubt that the discomfort associated with the change will not last forever. It’s imperative to understand that you do have control over how you view the situation and if you learn to embrace the struggles for what they’re worth, you will learn and grow as a result of said change in your life.
Your Discomfort Is Only Temporary
Everything happens in seasons. The winter always springs and the summer always falls. New life and opportunity abounds for those who can weather the storm. If you are dealing with a rather difficult change in your life such as the loss of a loved one, a financial disaster, or a shaky break-up, remember that the pain associated with such a change is only temporary.
The most important aspect of the process is accepting that change is going to come; you must embrace the way you feel and all the struggles you experience as a result of your feelings. It’s okay to be mad and upset; the most important aspect of dealing with unwanted changes in life is to remember that the discomfort is only a season and it too shall pass.
Take Note Of Right Now
Right now is all we’ll ever have. Yesterday is gone forever and tomorrow is never promised. All we have is this moment in time. My grandmother once told me that nothing else matters except how you feel at any given moment. Now, of course we have to realize we only ever really feel (in the present tense) anything right now, not tomorrow or yesterday. All we ever have conscious control of is the now.
Stop for a second and recognize what’s going on right now. What is it that you can appreciate and be thankful for at this very moment?
What can you learn from the struggles you’re currently facing? What can you discover about yourself by choosing how to feel and by dealing with the changes that weigh so heavily on your mind?
Remember, changes are consistent with the daily lives of everyone in the world. No one will live and die without experiencing plenty, if not many drastic changes during their existence. The only way to cope with your struggles is to embrace them for all their worth and gain as much knowledge from each experience.
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{ 30 comments… read them below or add one }
Hi JC. Just wanted to welcome you to CYT and to thank you for a very timely article. Change is what this blog is all about and rather than see change as something to be dreaded it should be embraced and seen as a gift of development and opportunity.
Thanks again JC, I know you will get a warm welcome from the CYT team.
Thanks for the opportunity!
Man I really resonate with this article simply because there’s something of a major change I’m working through right now.
I love this phrase:
“It’s imperative to understand that you do have control over how you view the situation and if you learn to embrace the struggles for what they’re worth, you will learn and grow as a result of said change in your life.”
One of the ways I’ve learned to embrace change is to redefine my definition of the word. I like to view change as transformation. Through my association of the word I personally find less resistance that way. It’s a conditioning process of course however I’ve found it to be helpful. This way I respond to a new situation or experience rather than react.
It won’t completely remove all discomfort but it does allow me to be less resistant and open to the new experience. Especially when I’m experiencing major shifts internally to handle major experiences externally.
Fantastic article. Thank you JC!
Sure, there will always be some resistance. It’s just a matter of getting to the least amount of resistance possible to carry on and improve.
JC,
Thanks for the outstanding article.
In the past, I was a lot more resistant to change than I am today. However, over the past couple of years, I have begun to actually enjoy just going with the flow and seeing where life takes me. This has made my life much easier. I am much less likely to fight circumstances which is usually a losing battle anyway.
For example, back in late December on a flight back home I had to spend a night at a hotel in Dallas because my connecting flight was cancelled due to weather. I really wanted to get home, so I wasn’t initially thrilled about this happening. But I soon made the decision to just accept the change and do my best to make the most of the situation.
One thing that really helps me deal with change is my underlying belief that everything happens for my greater good. Therefore, when confronted with change, I immediately try to start looking at ways that this is good for me. Basically, it goes back to looking at the glass as half-full instead of half-empty.
My guess is that we probably have control over half of the things that happen to us. And while we aren’t in control over the other half, we are in control of how we respond to them.
Also, great point about living in the present! I think that is very sage advice from your grandmother.
Same thing happened to me over winter break. I had a connecting flight in Chicago and had to spend the night there due to inclement weather. I was bummed at first but it ended up being an interesting night. I was glad I got to stay.
Nice post JC. I agree that it is important that we embrace our changes. Sometimes we may not like the changes that happen to us, whether this is getting a new job or finding ourselves in a new relationship with someone. There will be discomfort; but like you say, it will only be temporary in the beginning. By embracing the change, we can be more likely to enjoy it and find a way to overcome it. This gives us more experience and makes us into stronger people.
Absolutely. With change comes growth and growth/experience is how we accomplish great things in life.
You make some great points JC. Change is hard. Its hard because most of us like stability in our lives. I’ve found that learning to deal with change is about acceptance, living in the present, and taking a position of curiosity towards life. Life is, after all, an adventure.
If we can reframe our attitudes towards change it can be quite fun.
And I think that’s the main problem. Most choose not to change their attitudes(or they don’t know they can). As a result, life remains miserable and/or they don’t pick up on the lessons life is trying to teach them.
While not all change is good, we should always be looking for opportunities to innovate and expand on what we are doing. With the pace that things are constantly changing in the world if we do not adapt we are going to get left behind (especially when it comes to business and blogging).
Hi JC,
A timely article for a few of us it would seem. The point I would like to make is that don’t we normally embrace something we recognise/have affection for? Is is this just a ’stiff upper lip’ us Brits are known for, not sure now! Its not like I would embrace a stranger, but all of a sudden, a long, long time in coming, change is not such the stranger ‘it’ used to be. To be welcomed, entertained, nurtured. To anyone who is wary of change, at least be a good host!
apologies…’we don’t normally embrace something we don’t recognise/have affection for”
I like that last part.
That’s a fine way to look at it because the process of change/disappointment will often be just what you needed at the time.
Hi JC,
This is a good article on an interesting topic. You are right about our resistance to change – basically we are “hard-wired” to avoid change!
Change involves loss, be it of a relationship, a way of doing things or even an identity and your brain rebels against this “attack” on its normality. I see a lot of this in the work environment – implementing a new system can stir up a lot of resentment and the only consistantly reliable way of disarming it is proper training and emphasizing that it is a learning process.
Its the same in our personal lives too. There is a tendency to hang on to the familiar because it seems secure – its an illusion but its a comfortable one. The reality is that (as you say) no change means no growth.
My favourite quote on this topic is by Anne Morrow Lindbergh:
“Only in growth, reform and change, paradoxically enough, is true security to be found.”
Look forward yo your next post, mate !
Gareth
Great quote. It’s tough to think that the only way to improve and become a better person is through a process we all grumble about!
This is a fabulous article. I am a huge advocate of embracing change, even when it’s frightening, alarming or uncomfortable. I’ve lived long enough to have learned that without change (for me) there is no Life, no Vitality, no Growth, and often no self-esteem or sense of what we are capable of. I’ve reached a point in my life where I even seek out change when I feel it will help me grow more vividly.
Interestingly, some change may ask of us to “be still” and do nothing. Especially for those who are workaholics, etc. Or for those who have trouble just “being”. In that case maybe just “being” IS the change.
Wonderful post.
You have a wise grandmother! At my age I’ve learned to roll with the punches. When our four daughters were growing up and I’d be stressing about something when they were teenagers my husband would say, “Let it go…the sun will rise and the sun will set!” It had a way of calming me and sure enough the sun did. They’re all in their 30’s now doing well.
Awesome! I’m 23 now and I’m sure many of my loved ones are saying the same about me sometimes! “Let him go, he’ll get it all worked out… The sun will rise again.” hah!
I really like 30 days challenge to break the status quo. I know the initial discomfort can be tough so I set a fixed number of days where no matter what I’m going to stick with a new habit.
Oscar, I think that’s just what I needed to read this morning. Would you might expanding or sharing some more info with me?
There are a few things I’m working on that I believe would turn out even greater if I were to focus diligently for so many days.
Great post. I really thought your last sentence was poignant, “The only way to cope with your struggles is to embrace them for all their worth and gain as much knowledge from each experience.”
Life will not always be easy and sometimes we may not like the current hand we have been dealt, but when we are able to see the bigger picture and appreciate everything that arises in our life, we are so much better off. It is all about being able to embrace change and live and learn. Thanks for sharing your insights.
Thanks for your input. One of my favorite quotes goes like this: “…I say never be complete, I say stop being perfect, I say let… lets evolve, let the chips fall where they may. ”
This is from the movie Fight Club and to me, it’s a great example of a healthy outlook on life.
JC, a wonderful post about change. A subject some people reject out of sight, whilst others accept and eal with as and when it occurs. Without, where would we be; it’s a must for our own development. Our progress and learning rely on it.
Thank you for sharing this.
Regards
Paul
Nice post JC –
I always go with the Gandhi quote on this one – “be the change that you wish to see in the world”. If things are going to change it is better to be the instigator rather than the follower. It is a powerful thing to see the potential and push to make that happen. You are right that you need to do that in every moment as that is the only time we can every control. Thus change happens instant by instant and every second is precious. Great stuff JC – thanks!
Phil
I love that quote. We need more Gandhi’s in the world.
I’ve always believed that the only constant thing in life is CHANGE.
Change is inevitable, whether we like it or not, our life will keep moving on. when i look back at my life, there are things before that i hope didnt change, but now i realize that everythinghas a purpose and everything is now making sense.
On the other hand, ive strong believe that we should also be the Change that we wish to see in the world. Somtimes people get caught up in the recieving point, and keep complaining about life, but the truth sometimes we should look closely to ourseves and maybe is the condition of our hearts that need to be reconfigured. If we set an example to other people, we can influence them to change.
thanks for this post.
Absolutely, it’s like Phil said in the comment above. “Be the change we wish to see.”
I agree completely with the idea of leading by example and looking at ourselves personally before looking out onto others.
JC´s last blog ..Fitness Simplicity
Embrace is definitely the way forward! But, personally I love change so I find it easy – I can also see how others may find it difficult.
Craig Thomas´s last blog ..The New ABC’s of Success: Always Be Creating
well, it’s a good thing you love change because many don’t. More power to you! I’m sure you will go far with that attitude!!
JC´s last blog ..The Perfect Caloric Surplus